# Spending going out of control?



## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 5, 2009)

Does anyone else feel like their spending habits are starting to go out of control? I've been wondering if I'm the only person or one of the very few people who get this "thrill" from shopping. 

I love shopping, as everyone else on this forum probably does also lol. But I don't just love it I *L-O-V-E* it. I like to buy anything pretty much. My main addiction is MAC though obviously lol. But I've been spending money lately on other stuff. I just keep buying and buying. I'm a big bargain hunter so I always try to rationalize with myself that I got a good deal on whatever I had bought. I feel like I'm not safe whenever I'm out, not even at home cause you can shop online. 

I'm only 18 and currently have 4 major credits cards and 2 department store charge cards. I've been really good with paying the bills on time and in full as to not be charged a late fee or any interest. I mostly use my Sears Mastercard which allows me to pay my bill in store with cash. Like the thought of having to count X amount of cash out and have to walk my ass up to the mall and pay the bill for the card does make me think. Sometimes I feel like I'm going insane with this spending. But I'll feel like I'm going insane if I CAN'T shop either. The only thing I can compare this carefree feeling I get to is being high. It just feels so damn good, better than anything else I have ever felt. 

But it's starting to seriously scare me after I just opened up a bank account for the first time. I think the fact that I'm hopefully going to get this job at Walgreens *knock on wood* is just going to make it worse. Cause I'll think I'll have the money to buy whatever. I mean I still have to budget for school, but I have a feeling that the day after payday (minus the money I put aside for school) is going to be all gone in a single day. My mom is always telling me that I'm horrible with saving up money and that I'm not going to have any money ever because of my spending. I'm dead afraid that she's right.


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## Beauty Mark (Mar 5, 2009)

It sounds like you're addicted to shopping. You need to learn to curb it before it truly gets out of control. Have you tried keeping a list of every cent you spend? Perhaps that'll scare you straight. You may as well look into it now rather than when you're drowning in debt. Most young people I know have had a run in with debt. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Try to find something else good to concentrate on than shopping. Shopping is fun and all, but all you're doing is buying stuff. Volunteer, learn some new skill, do something.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 5, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Beauty Mark* 

 
_It sounds like you're addicted to shopping. You need to learn to curb it before it truly gets out of control. Have you tried keeping a list of every cent you spend? Perhaps that'll scare you straight. You may as well look into it now rather than when you're drowning in debt. Most young people I know have had a run in with debt. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Try to find something else good to concentrate on than shopping. Shopping is fun and all, but all you're doing is buying stuff. Volunteer, learn some new skill, do something._

 
I'm super scared that this is truly going to be out of control in the future. I've seen those talk shows like Doctor Phil where they had an episode on people addicted to shopping. Some of those people were like $80,000+ in debt cause of shopping. I keep saying that I won't let it get that bad but you never know. 

I don't keep a physical list of how much I'm spending and what I'm buying, more like a mental one. And all I can say is WOW. I think I'm going to get this program on my cell phone (since I always have my cell on me) that allows you to keep track of spending and how much money you still have. 

I'm trying to think of something else I can focus on besides work to put most of my effort and time into. I live within walking distance from 2 malls and several shopping centers and a ton of individual stores. I don't drive yet so I'm stuck walking everywhere. To be honest, I barely hang out with friends cause I live so far from them. In a way I feel like shopping is all I have that makes me feel I guess okay at the end of the day. But the pricetag is killing me though.


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## Septemba (Mar 5, 2009)

I really enjoy your threads, 4bidden. Not the struggles or anything, just the topics you bring up. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





It sounds like you're aware where it can head, which is great because you can start to haul it in if you need to. I relate to the thrill of it, especially with MU. I got used to big hauls for a while there to the point that if I just bought one thing, I wouldn't even enjoy it properly because I'd be wanting more...! I think it's a matter of habit where we become accustomed to these amounts and the feelings they give us. 

I had this massive list of all the MU I'd planned to buy over the coming weeks, but I had to pull right back because of a horrific bill and to help a friend out. Because I had this extra time to actually go over the things I wanted, I swear I knocked 75% of crap off that list. 

I think really being sure of what you want and being brutal about lists helps, as well as budgeting for sure.


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## chickatthegym (Mar 5, 2009)

4Bidden I can totally relate!!! I think I have a form of OCD where I become obsessed with buying certain things (for awhile it was Victoria's Secret PINK sweats, then Bath and Body/VS Lotions and Body sprays, now it is MAC).  I def know the thrill you are talking about.  Sept. is right- if you think about your purchases you will not buy as much.  I know it sometimes isn't as fun though as a compulsive shopping spree and it can be hard.  I always get caught up in the moment, in the MAC store or counter and esp online!  I think I am going to start budgeting out a certain amount to spend on makeup and force myself to pick specific products rather than buy everything.  

You aren't alone though


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## ms.marymac (Mar 5, 2009)

Some things that have helped me:



Keep a written tally of what you spend, and how much you  have coming in. The checking account can be helpful with this.  Fill out your register as soon as you can.  If you look at the statement and see that you are spending more $ that's coming in, there's a problem.  I think just seeing the amount can sober you up a little.

When you see something you just have to have, make yourself wait at least two days.  Sometimes you will find that you didn't really want it after all.  

When you get your job, ask yourself how many hours of work it would take to purchase the item you are lemming, then ask yourself if it's worth it. 

Hide a bunch of goodies in a cabinet, and shop your stash.  I know it sounds goofy, but sometimes if you are buying a bunch of goodies, you'll forget you have something and a few months down the road when you peek in that cabinet, it will kind of satisfy the need for something new. 

Don't try to stop all at once.  Take it one day at a time.  Sometimes if you purge the shopping habit, down the road you will "binge" and be right back where you started. Don't beat yourself up if you slip up. 

Remember, a small leak will sink a great ship. Even if it's on sale, little things add up.


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## Lizzie (Mar 5, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *ms.marymac* 

 
_
When you see something you just have to have, make yourself wait at least two days.  Sometimes you will find that you didn't really want it after all.  
_

 
This is a great piece of advice!  I do this with MAC collections, sometimes.  If I wait a little while after the collection has been out, I find that my list shrinks.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 5, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Septemba* 

 
_I really enjoy your threads, 4bidden. Not the struggles or anything, just the topics you bring up. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




It sounds like you're aware where it can head, which is great because you can start to haul it in if you need to. I relate to the thrill of it, especially with MU. I got used to big hauls for a while there to the point that if I just bought one thing, I wouldn't even enjoy it properly because I'd be wanting more...! I think it's a matter of habit where we become accustomed to these amounts and the feelings they give us. 

I had this massive list of all the MU I'd planned to buy over the coming weeks, but I had to pull right back because of a horrific bill and to help a friend out. Because I had this extra time to actually go over the things I wanted, I swear I knocked 75% of crap off that list. 

I think really being sure of what you want and being brutal about lists helps, as well as budgeting for sure._

 
Thanks hun! I just feel like I can open up real easily on here with no problem, everyone is so nice on here 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




!

I actually never did many big hauls when I was working at my last job. It would be more of like me planning want I most likely wanted to buy at the the MAC counter and just a matter of going out there and paying for it. I'd spend about $60 every week to two weeks. The rest of my work money I would hoard it so I could have money during the summer and until I could find work again. 

But I've been making more frequent trips lately to the counter sometimes just simply cause I'm at the mall! And boy is this hello kitty collection killing me! I have made so far 4 trips back to the counter so far just for hello kitty items. I always tell myself that I'm done and that I need to quit buying more but nope. Please don't get me started on the kouture collection...

I know I don't NEED these things. But I think there is something wrong with me seriously lol. I'll freak out over not being able to have these things that I honestly can't even sleep okay at night. LOL over dramatic but it's the truth! The rest of the time I'm stressing over and losing sleep thinking about how I'm going to be able to pay for all of this. It's horrible but I've basically been borrowing money for all of this cause I don't have a job officially yet. I even went as far as asking the guy I was kind of involved with for a small loan. I didn't get it though cause I was in a hurry to leave his house but I'm glad that I didn't take the money. He has given me lectures on my spending before several times. 

I think I'm going to go through and look at the items that are suppose to come out for the next few collections and just really crack down on what I don't need or want from those collections. I guess I'm going to have to give up on quite a few more things to try to make up for the damage hello kitty has been and going to do to me 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




.

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *chickatthegym* 

 
_4Bidden I can totally relate!!! I think I have a form of OCD where I become obsessed with buying certain things (for awhile it was Victoria's Secret PINK sweats, then Bath and Body/VS Lotions and Body sprays, now it is MAC).  I def know the thrill you are talking about.  Sept. is right- if you think about your purchases you will not buy as much.  I know it sometimes isn't as fun though as a compulsive shopping spree and it can be hard.  I always get caught up in the moment, in the MAC store or counter and esp online!  I think I am going to start budgeting out a certain amount to spend on makeup and force myself to pick specific products rather than buy everything.  

You aren't alone though
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 
I'm the same way with being obsessed with one thing at a time. I'm even the same way with MAC too. Like I use to be obsessed with getting different eyeshadows and now I've just recently moved onto lip color and blushes. 

I just feel sooo damn good walking up to the counter and getting my things... Seriously, screw drugs when you have MAC lol.


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## Mabelle (Mar 5, 2009)

i have trouble too 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




im working on it. I find it;s a lot easier now that i dont work in a mall anymore. that was a disaster.


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## reesesilverstar (Mar 5, 2009)

Yes, I agree. My spending was out of control until yesterday tho! I cut up every last one of my credit and store charge cards... My fiance laffed his @$$ off when he walked thru the door and saw my pile.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 5, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *ms.marymac* 

 
_Some things that have helped me:



Keep a written tally of what you spend, and how much you  have coming in. The checking account can be helpful with this.  Fill out your register as soon as you can.  If you look at the statement and see that you are spending more $ that's coming in, there's a problem.  I think just seeing the amount can sober you up a little.

When you see something you just have to have, make yourself wait at least two days.  Sometimes you will find that you didn't really want it after all.  

When you get your job, ask yourself how many hours of work it would take to purchase the item you are lemming, then ask yourself if it's worth it. 

Hide a bunch of goodies in a cabinet, and shop your stash.  I know it sounds goofy, but sometimes if you are buying a bunch of goodies, you'll forget you have something and a few months down the road when you peek in that cabinet, it will kind of satisfy the need for something new. 

Don't try to stop all at once.  Take it one day at a time.  Sometimes if you purge the shopping habit, down the road you will "binge" and be right back where you started. Don't beat yourself up if you slip up. 

Remember, a small leak will sink a great ship. Even if it's on sale, little things add up._

 
Thanks for the tips 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I just got a check register yesterday when I opened up an account. It'll def come in handy, probably even better than the cell phone idea. I can type stuff out on my phone like it's nothing but with the register I gotta find a pen and whip it out and actually write everything out. 

I'm super paranoid about overdrafting, bounced checks, and all of that jazz. I'm hoping that it'll limit my credit card use so that I'll only use 1 or 2 credit cards for each month so it'll be even easier to keep track. 

I think it'll get easier after the hello kitty about deciding whether I really should get a certain item or not. I'm just a big hello kitty freak that I have this urgency in me that literally starts effecting me physically (similar to having a panic attack) if I don't get a certain item from the collection. The kouture collection just came out today, I pre-ordered everything...the feeling is starting to kick in 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. 

Yeah I should put my hello kitty goodies into a cute little bag and hide it somewhere that's not usually visible to me for a few days. Then I'll go back and realize what I actually bought. 

Shopping is such a huge part of my life. Sounds materialistic and pathetic but it's true. I seriously live for the next "thrill". There is just something about having something that is tangible that makes you feel good. It's sort of like "proof" that you can still be happy and excited I guess 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. I just don't want to get to a point where I'm getting phone calls from debt collectors cause I can't pay for whatever I bought. I wanna still be able to enjoy shopping but not be so I guess crazy about it.


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## stronqerx (Mar 5, 2009)

I basically don't spend money that I don't have. The way I see it is, why am I going to buy a ton of clothes that I probably won't wear or will wear for a while, and then be stuck with a credit card bill? I am 21, and I have a lot f credit cards. Infact, my mom and sister charge things on my card and pay me back because I have better credit than both of them. Credit can be a tricky thing, it's no joke, sometimes I think If I wanted to I can go crazy and blow $10,000+ and charge it all (I won't dare to though, but just goes to show how extreme it can get). But like I said I don't spend money I dont have. I am not going to lie, I have charged things in the past (that's how I got good credit), but I've paid back everything on time and have never missed a payment (like you). Still I don't like being a slave to credit card companies, so I haven't used credit in a long time. That being said, I have skipped out on a lot of mac collections, because honestly they come and they go, they fade fast (well atleast to me & I am broke hahaha). I only got HK cause I had a gift card from xmas. I was tempted to buy more, but I ask myself....I already got two lipglosses from the collection, do I really need any more? No, honestly it's all about control.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 5, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Mabelle* 

 
_i have trouble too 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




im working on it. I find it;s a lot easier now that i dont work in a mall anymore. that was a disaster._

 
I know exactly what you mean girl! I had applied to like almost every store at the bigger mall by where I live. Luckily I didn't get hired for any job there. I can only imagine how worse things would be right now if I was in the same building as a MAC counter is at...
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	







Where I live there really isn't much to do to occupy yourself unless you have money cause it's just stores stores and more stores! 

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *reesesilverstar* 

 
_Yes, I agree. My spending was out of control until yesterday tho! I cut up every last one of my credit and store charge cards... My fiance laffed his @$$ off when he walked thru the door and saw my pile._

 
I've thought about cutting up some of my cards cause I feel like I have way too many for someone this young and just in general. But my dad would have a fucking fit. He's all been about helping me establish credit and wants me to have one of each major credit card (At least one Discover, Visa, and Mastercard) in case of an emergency or whatever. 

Then I thought about just calling the card company up and asking about canceling my accounts with them. But it can possibly hurt my credit score and report. I don't want to risk that when I just establish some form of credit.


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## Mabelle (Mar 5, 2009)

i worked in a mall with a mac counter...

my first job (in the mall), i was treated pretty badly. Whenever i went on break and felt stressed out, or angry (which was most of the time) i went to mac. And now, .... well... you know.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 5, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *stronqerx* 

 
_I basically don't spend money that I don't have. The way I see it is, why am I going to buy a ton of clothes that I probably won't wear or will wear for a while, and then be stuck with a credit card bill? I am 21, and I have a lot f credit cards. Infact, my mom and sister charge things on my card and pay me back because I have better credit than both of them. Credit can be a tricky thing, it's no joke, sometimes I think If I wanted to I can go crazy and blow $10,000+ and charge it all (I won't dare to though, but just goes to show how extreme it can get). But like I said I don't spend money I dont have. I am not going to lie, I have charged things in the past (that's how I got good credit), but I've paid back everything on time and have never missed a payment (like you). Still I don't like being a slave to credit card companies, so I haven't used credit in a long time. That being said, I have skipped out on a lot of mac collections, because honestly they come and they go, they fade fast (well atleast to me & I am broke hahaha). I only got HK cause I had a gift card from xmas. I was tempted to buy more, but I ask myself....I already got two lipglosses from the collection, do I really need any more? No, honestly it's all about control._

 
If only I could blow $10,000+ on my credit card and not have to pay it back...I'll just keep on dreaming 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	







I've only recently got back into clothes shopping cause I had put on some weight and wanted to get that all off before investing money on new clothes. So everything has mostly been going to MAC as usual.

It's funny though cause I'm such a control freak in real life. I need things done MY way all the time. But when it comes to my spending I feel as if I don't have enough control over things.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 5, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Mabelle* 

 
_i worked in a mall with a mac counter...

my first job (in the mall), i was treated pretty badly. Whenever i went on break and felt stressed out, or angry (which was most of the time) i went to mac. And now, .... well... you know._

 
I use MAC to make myself feel better too. Everytime something super stressful would come up I'd go run out to the mall to get MAC. 

When I found out the guy I was in love with last year was going to basic training for the army, I blew $100+ at the mall in less than an hour. The difference from back then and now was that back then I ACTUALLY had the money to pay for that. I don't now =[


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## MissResha (Mar 5, 2009)

i know how bad this can be. i used to be addicted to the deals on ebay many years ago. i quit cold turkey cuz i'd find myself waking up at like 2am to see if i won something, or to put in my bid at the VERY last second. it was pretty bad. i have an addictive personality.

as of now, i spoil myself. i work very hard. i dont have any kids. i dont have any major credit cards. just a bank issued one. i do have small amounts of debt, but its all under 2g's lol. i can easily pay that off. i just need to do it. i have a pretty good paying job as a web developer/designer for a great company in DC (we did obama's site 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 ) and i spend a small percentage of my paycheck on whatever the fuck i want. i dont have any other MAJOR bills. so i mean, thats my excuse.

i know whats more important though, so if i ever do get pregnant, i may sell all my shit or just sloooow down on buying. but for the moment i'm enjoying myself. and i looooooooove a good deal!


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## kdemers1221 (Mar 6, 2009)

I find that when I don't have money to spend on extra things is when I want them the most. As soon as I have the money to afford it I realize that it really wasn't something I wanted or that I don't really want to spend the money on it. The waiting a couple days tip is a great idea. It's a great way to determine whether it's something you really want and will use/wear or if it's just at the moment lust type thing. Also, like other said, keep a tally. It's easy to justify a sale price item but add up all those sales and you're really spending A LOT of money. Just keep yourself honest about it.


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## MzzRach (Mar 6, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *ms.marymac* 

 
_Some things that have helped me:



Keep a written tally of what you spend, and how much you have coming in. The checking account can be helpful with this. Fill out your register as soon as you can. If you look at the statement and see that you are spending more $ that's coming in, there's a problem. I think just seeing the amount can sober you up a little.

When you see something you just have to have, make yourself wait at least two days. Sometimes you will find that you didn't really want it after all. 

When you get your job, ask yourself how many hours of work it would take to purchase the item you are lemming, then ask yourself if it's worth it. 

Hide a bunch of goodies in a cabinet, and shop your stash. I know it sounds goofy, but sometimes if you are buying a bunch of goodies, you'll forget you have something and a few months down the road when you peek in that cabinet, it will kind of satisfy the need for something new. 

Don't try to stop all at once. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes if you purge the shopping habit, down the road you will "binge" and be right back where you started. Don't beat yourself up if you slip up. 

Remember, a small leak will sink a great ship. Even if it's on sale, little things add up._

 
This is great advice.


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## zzoester (Mar 6, 2009)

I used to have a serious spending problem and I lived beyond my means for a few years. Fortunately, my parents helped correct my financial issues once and for all about 4 years ago and I have been perfectly responsible ever since. I am really lucky. I can relate the shopping rush. I still get it from time to time, but these days I am more realistic. I am a bargain shopper and I always set a budget for myself and I NEVER spend money I do not have or cannot afford. 

Try buying everything using cash. Nothing worked for me....UNTIL I started setting a weekly budget. CASH budget. I spend a lot less when I deal with cash only.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 6, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *MissResha* 

 
_i know how bad this can be. i used to be addicted to the deals on ebay many years ago. i quit cold turkey cuz i'd find myself waking up at like 2am to see if i won something, or to put in my bid at the VERY last second. it was pretty bad. i have an addictive personality.

as of now, i spoil myself. i work very hard. i dont have any kids. i dont have any major credit cards. just a bank issued one. i do have small amounts of debt, but its all under 2g's lol. i can easily pay that off. i just need to do it. i have a pretty good paying job as a web developer/designer for a great company in DC (we did obama's site 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





 ) and i spend a small percentage of my paycheck on whatever the fuck i want. i dont have any other MAJOR bills. so i mean, thats my excuse.

i know whats more important though, so if i ever do get pregnant, i may sell all my shit or just sloooow down on buying. but for the moment i'm enjoying myself. and i looooooooove a good deal!_

 
I too have an addictive personality. I easily get hooked on things and just have to keep doing them for a long time. I'll usually get over it eventually when I find the next fun thing. But shopping has always stayed though.

I do check ebay every now and then just out of curiosity. There have been items that I really did want to buy right then and there when I seen them but I didn't have a credit card back then. I'm actually only really interested in the "buy it now" option. I can't stand auctions cause there's no guarantee you'll be able to buy it and make it yours lol. I love instant gratification lol.

Even with cutting down on my spending I still can see me spoiling myself too in the future. Just hopefully not outrageously. The only people I really have to support when I'm older are my parents and my mom's side of the family in China. And maybe a dog? I've been wanting to get a pet for a while now just stupid allergies stopping me. I don't see myself having children anytime soon, so that's one less person(s) I have to worry about financially. I just gotta super budget everything and cut out a lot of the things I will NOT need at all (like a home phone...grrr...been wanting to get rid of that crap for ages now). 

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *kdemers1221* 

 
_I find that when I don't have money to spend on extra things is when I want them the most. As soon as I have the money to afford it I realize that it really wasn't something I wanted or that I don't really want to spend the money on it. The waiting a couple days tip is a great idea. It's a great way to determine whether it's something you really want and will use/wear or if it's just at the moment lust type thing. Also, like other said, keep a tally. It's easy to justify a sale price item but add up all those sales and you're really spending A LOT of money. Just keep yourself honest about it._

 
Oh do the sales add up! With low prices I just feel the need that it's okay to just go buy more since their all on "sale". I forget that it's money that I'm actually still spending towards something. 

I too feel that a lot of the things I've been wanting keep coming up right about this time and I don't have money for it. Just makes temptation worse. 


 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *zzoester* 

 
_I used to have a serious spending problem and I lived beyond my means for a few years. Fortunately, my parents helped correct my financial issues once and for all about 4 years ago and I have been perfectly responsible ever since. I am really lucky. I can relate the shopping rush. I still get it from time to time, but these days I am more realistic. I am a bargain shopper and I always set a budget for myself and I NEVER spend money I do not have or cannot afford. 

Try buying everything using cash. Nothing worked for me....UNTIL I started setting a weekly budget. CASH budget. I spend a lot less when I deal with cash only._

 
My mom agrees with you that cash is the best way to go. No interest. No late fees. Only thing though is that it's just not that secure. I've had money stolen from me before when I thought it was safe, so I've been iffy about carrying cash around. I even refused a debit card and an ATM card from the bank cause they don't make me feel safe.

 I know you have to carry some amount of cash around cause theres certain things a credit card can't buy like the trolley fare. So I think I'm going to withrdraw each month a certain amount of cash, very low amount and pressure myself to pay with that cash for my purchases but must still have enough to take the trolley so that I'll be willing to spend less.


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## stronqerx (Mar 6, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_If only I could blow $10,000+ on my credit card and not have to pay it back...I'll just keep on dreaming 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	







I've only recently got back into clothes shopping cause I had put on some weight and wanted to get that all off before investing money on new clothes. So everything has mostly been going to MAC as usual.

It's funny though cause I'm such a control freak in real life. I need things done MY way all the time. But when it comes to my spending I feel as if I don't have enough control over things._

 

HAHAHA, i know right! One can only dream
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I haven't bought clothes in the longest time either & I too have gained weight. I refuse to buy any clothes until my ass loses the extra pounds!


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 6, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *stronqerx* 

 
_HAHAHA, i know right! One can only dream
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I haven't bought clothes in the longest time either & I too have gained weight. I refuse to buy any clothes until my ass loses the extra pounds!
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 
Lol, in my dream it's more like a million bucks...but yep it isn't going to happen haha! 

I haven't done much clothes shopping either. I've only been buying some light jackets/hoodies (where I live I have crappy cold weather for at least 6 months straight) cause the jackets I already had were getting too small. I've bought a few shirts too since I barely have anything in my closet that fits me okay anymore. No pants though cause when I do drop the lbs, they'll be useless while a jacket and some shirts I can still wear. But everything I get is on clearance lol! HELL NO I will not spend a bajillion bucks on my "fat" clothes or clothes period haha. 

I did recently go on a crazy panty shopping frenzy. It had been a while since I've bought new undies and my stupid washer ruins them 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. 




I just got my new Discover card in the mail today 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. My dad had made me apply for it since there was a promotion for new Discover card members and we would get $100 back. I'm going to use it towards groceries cause we have to spend money on food regardless. It'll just help with the cashback offer. It's pink and has my initial on it too, ahh I just hope this doesn't entice me to use it all the time


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## LMD84 (Mar 6, 2009)

i leave my credit cards at home now when i go shopping. and when i do go on a shopping trip i budget how much money i can spend - realistically (no good saying you'll be good and spend $30 when really you know you'll spend about $50) i then take that amount of cash out of a machine and then that's my shopping money. if i run out i run out and because i don't have my cards with me it's not an option to spend on those.

what i find hard is online shopping with mac! i try and only order once every month when i've been paid and the new collection is out. but recently i've spent a couple of times a month whihc i need to nip in the bud...


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## BloopBloop (Mar 6, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Septemba* 

 
_*I really enjoy your threads, 4bidden. Not the struggles or anything, just the topics you bring up. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


*

It sounds like you're aware where it can head, which is great because you can start to haul it in if you need to. I relate to the thrill of it, especially with MU. I got used to big hauls for a while there to the point that if I just bought one thing, I wouldn't even enjoy it properly because I'd be wanting more...! I think it's a matter of habit where we become accustomed to these amounts and the feelings they give us. 

I had this massive list of all the MU I'd planned to buy over the coming weeks, but I had to pull right back because of a horrific bill and to help a friend out. Because I had this extra time to actually go over the things I wanted, I swear I knocked 75% of crap off that list. 

I think really being sure of what you want and being brutal about lists helps, as well as budgeting for sure._

 
i couldnt agree any more. when i look at the topic starter of the thread i click on, your name shows up many times. 

now to add on, i definitely feel like im digging my own grave with each purchase. whenever i save up to pay off my bill, i get that feeling of relief because that chunk has been taken off my balance-- and then i sneak off to mac or the sale forum and do some more shopping ='[


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## Ruby_Woo (Mar 6, 2009)

I feel like I still spend on things that I shouldn't. I only have one department store card, one retail chain card and my bank one, the total credit combined comes to 1,300 so its not really high which is good cus if I had a credit limit of 10,000 Id be all about spending!

Im trying to limit myself though. I really am.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 6, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *LMD84* 

 
_i leave my credit cards at home now when i go shopping. and when i do go on a shopping trip i budget how much money i can spend - realistically (no good saying you'll be good and spend $30 when really you know you'll spend about $50) i then take that amount of cash out of a machine and then that's my shopping money. if i run out i run out and because i don't have my cards with me it's not an option to spend on those.

what i find hard is online shopping with mac! i try and only order once every month when i've been paid and the new collection is out. but recently i've spent a couple of times a month whihc i need to nip in the bud..._

 
Yeah, I'll def need to be carrying cash more often soon instead of so many cards. Cause with cash once it's gone it's *GONE*, buh-byes! I always like to leave enough cash after spending for a trolley or bus fare in case I'm stranded somewhere and need to get home. 

Has anyone had something that they considered a "security blanket"? Something that they like to have with them practically all the time cause it makes them feel I guess okay and secure? I had spoken to my therapist about all of this and she realized that I use my cell phone and credit cards as a form of security blanket. My cell phone allows me to be able to talk to people via phone call, text, or instant message if I need to tell someone something. And my credit cards make me feel safe in case I'm in an emergency situation and don't have enough cash on hand for help. I hope this makes sense. But take either one away from me and I literally freak out and panic. Meh, I'm so weird 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




.

The way I have my bank account, I can't touch any of my money unless I actually go into the bank and see a teller. I can also have access to it from online but I'm not tech savvy enough yet to be making bank transactions online haha. 

I use to try to make frequent trips to MAC but I wasn't allowed to spend all my makeup budget money all on one trip. I'd split it up so that I could go to the counter and get something each week. This way I'd get that "thrill" each week. But now, I just want it ALL at once. 

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *BloopBloop* 

 
_i couldnt agree any more. when i look at the topic starter of the thread i click on, your name shows up many times. 

now to add on, i definitely feel like im digging my own grave with each purchase. whenever i save up to pay off my bill, i get that feeling of relief because that chunk has been taken off my balance-- and then i sneak off to mac or the sale forum and do some more shopping ='[ 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	








_

 
Lol, I always feel as if I'm starting way too many posts on here! I just like hearing from different people and hear things from all angles. 

I too feel like I'm less than an inch away from hitting 6 feet
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. I swear it really is like an endless cycle! I get that relief also whenever I'm off to pay off my credit card bill in full every time I'm almost due for payment. But then I'll just start wandering off to different places at the mall and the MAC counter and I'll just owe money all over again. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I've been taking sneak peaks at the sale forums here too and I've actually made a mental note of which items I wanted to buy. But then I remember uhh, I don't have the funds for any of this. I think I'm going to sell some of the things that I have accumulated that I don't really use or actually need. This way I'll hopefully be able to dig my way out of this soon to be grave bit by bit.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 6, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Ruby_Woo* 

 
_I feel like I still spend on things that I shouldn't. I only have one department store card, one retail chain card and my bank one, the total credit combined comes to 1,300 so its not really high which is good cus if I had a credit limit of 10,000 Id be all about spending!

Im trying to limit myself though. I really am._

 
Your actually so lucky to have such a low limit! All of my card's limits total up if all of them are added together in the $20,000+ range 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




.  I had been told that it's really hard to get credit cards when you have no credit established before I had my first major credit card. Uhh, they were soooo wrong. I got each and everyone of my cards so easily with no hassle whatsoever. It's actually kind of scary how easy it is to get one and then another one and another one... And yeah I've been lemming over the Bank of America Hello Kitty credit card 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. My dad is no help either. I swear the man is my enabler when it comes to credit cards. I know he means well when he says he wants me to establish some credit for the future. Plus the man is also quite a spender too! He's and odd mix of cheap and shopaholic. Our quality time is spent....ahem..shopping! 

Please do me a favor and don't open up any more cards unless you *ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY NEED *another one!


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## BloopBloop (Mar 6, 2009)

i think its easier for college students to get a hold of credit cards. i had 3 my first year, 2 of them i got at the same time-- a month after i got my first credit card. Something i seriously regret ever doing. i wish i had just stuck with one credit card, my bill would be so much easier to pay off. 

i thought i had a problem with my bills, babe you take the cake! my bills combined is about $3300. urgh i feel guilty just typing and looking at the number


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## Ruby_Woo (Mar 6, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_Your actually so lucky to have such a low limit! All of my card's limits total up if all of them are added together in the $20,000+ range 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




.  I had been told that it's really hard to get credit cards when you have no credit established before I had my first major credit card. Uhh, they were soooo wrong. I got each and everyone of my cards so easily with no hassle whatsoever. It's actually kind of scary how easy it is to get one and then another one and another one... And yeah I've been lemming over the Bank of America Hello Kitty credit card 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. My dad is no help either. I swear the man is my enabler when it comes to credit cards. I know he means well when he says he wants me to establish some credit for the future. Plus the man is also quite a spender too! He's and odd mix of cheap and shopaholic. Our quality time is spent....ahem..shopping! 

Please do me a favor and don't open up any more cards unless you *ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY NEED *another one!_

 
check if your bank lets you customize your cards! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 I know my bank you can choose ANY image and just pay $9 and they will send you a custom card. 

If I want a hello kitty card, I can just choose the image upload it to my banks site and in 2 weeks they would send it.

Right now I haven't found an image I like though.

Check that out instead of opening a whole new account for an HK card


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 6, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *BloopBloop* 

 
_i think its easier for college students to get a hold of credit cards. i had 3 my first year, 2 of them i got at the same time-- a month after i got my first credit card. Something i seriously regret ever doing. i wish i had just stuck with one credit card, my bill would be so much easier to pay off. 

i thought i had a problem with my bills, babe you take the cake! my bills combined is about $3300. urgh i feel guilty just typing and looking at the number_

 
It's actually funny that I put down that I'm not a student and that I'm currently unemployed for the applications that may ask those questions and I still get a card lol. I guess since they know that I'm young they think that I'll go out and spend like crazy and not be a responsible. Which they are right partially but I still pay off my bills in full and on time so they won't be getting no interest rates and late fees from this little missy 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




.

I currently owe $42 on my Macy's charge from my last trip to get some Hello Kitty goodies. And this Monday, I don't even want to imagine how much is going on my Discover Card cause of the kouture collection 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. Basically my parents are going to be cashing *MY* first several paychecks instead of me getting my moolah. 

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Ruby_Woo* 

 
_check if your bank lets you customize your cards! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 I know my bank you can choose ANY image and just pay $9 and they will send you a custom card. 

If I want a hello kitty card, I can just choose the image upload it to my banks site and in 2 weeks they would send it.

Right now I haven't found an image I like though.

Check that out instead of opening a whole new account for an HK card 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 
That's such a great idea! It's sort of like the CapitalOne concept where you can customize the image on the card to whatever you want it to be. Too bad I dont have a credit card with my bank at this moment though 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. I can't do a debit card either. So either way I'd have to open up another credit account with someone. Grrrr, I wish they had this option with EVERY credit card company 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




.

Edit: Discover did send me out a cute pink striped card with the letter Z for Zhen on it though. It's super cute! Maybe I'll just settle for that for now.....OR I could call them up and ask them if they do customized cards!


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## User35 (Mar 7, 2009)

I spend waaaay too much money....i just got my tax return and Im contimplating buying a new vuitton bag....eeek ! I havent even bought it yet and Im already feeling guilty.


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## Ruby_Woo (Mar 7, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *NatalieR429* 

 
_I spend waaaay too much money....i just got my tax return and Im contimplating buying a new vuitton bag....eeek ! I havent even bought it yet and Im already feeling guilty._

 
We don't get anything back, even w/ a child 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




You know what sucks? When I see people who aren't "legally" married, (but they live together and such as a married couple) and they get like $7,000 back! plus the stimulus coming up! yeah. I witnessed this. Oh well I guess.


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## stronqerx (Mar 7, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_Your actually so lucky to have such a low limit! All of my card's limits total up if all of them are added together in the $20,000+ range 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. I had been told that it's really hard to get credit cards when you have no credit established before I had my first major credit card. Uhh, they were soooo wrong. I got each and everyone of my cards so easily with no hassle whatsoever. It's actually kind of scary how easy it is to get one and then another one and another one... And yeah I've been lemming over the Bank of America Hello Kitty credit card 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. My dad is no help either. I swear the man is my enabler when it comes to credit cards. I know he means well when he says he wants me to establish some credit for the future. Plus the man is also quite a spender too! He's and odd mix of cheap and shopaholic. Our quality time is spent....ahem..shopping! 

Please do me a favor and don't open up any more cards unless you *ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY NEED *another one!_

 
Me too! My dad pushed me to get good credit cause he didn't want me to be like my mom & sister, they have a history of bad credit. He has really good credit too, so I get it from him. At the same time he hates using credit and he's cheap but he insists that having credit is a good thing for emergencies and for the future, and I agree. I have three major credit cards, and I established my credit when I was 18, and I never understood why people said It was so difficult to start credit. I started off with a $500 credit line and it went up in about a yr to like $3000, lmao. That's just one card, I have clothing store cards too, express, victorias secret, ect. I haven't used credit in a long time. Sometimes I use the clothing store ones, because it's no interest and you get discounts. Also If I want to buy things online I use my debt card instead, that helps a lot too, if you don't wanna carry around so much $$.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 7, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *NatalieR429* 

 
_I spend waaaay too much money....i just got my tax return and Im contimplating buying a new vuitton bag....eeek ! I havent even bought it yet and Im already feeling guilty._

 
Your lucky you got enough on your tax return to afford a LV bag girl! I'm only getting $50 on mines 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. But that's cause I had worked at my school as a cafeteria aide before I graduated and only made like $1,600 ish. And yep that $50 is also going to my parents to help pay off the money that I owe them. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Ruby_Woo* 

 
_We don't get anything back, even w/ a child 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




You know what sucks? When I see people who aren't "legally" married, (but they live together and such as a married couple) and they get like $7,000 back! plus the stimulus coming up! yeah. I witnessed this. Oh well I guess._

 
That sucks! Here in Pennsylvania, my parents were told that they changed the guidelines and that they are no longer able to get money back when a kid turns 17 instead of when they turn 18. So last year when I was 17 they weren't able to get anything back for me. They can still get something back for my brother since he's only 13. It's ass I tell ya! Homes with kids need the money more than anyone else really. 

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *stronqerx* 

 
_Me too! My dad pushed me to get good credit cause he didn't want me to be like my mom & sister, they have a history of bad credit. He has really good credit too, so I get it from him. At the same time he hates using credit and he's cheap but he insists that having credit is a good thing for emergencies and for the future, and I agree. I have three major credit cards, and I established my credit when I was 18, and I never understood why people said It was so difficult to start credit. I started off with a $500 credit line and it went up in about a yr to like $3000, lmao. That's just one card, I have clothing store cards too, express, victorias secret, ect. I haven't used credit in a long time. Sometimes I use the clothing store ones, because it's no interest and you get discounts. Also If I want to buy things online I use my debt card instead, that helps a lot too, if you don't wanna carry around so much $$._

 
According to my dad he has pretty good credit, not sure what the exact score he has is though. But he's able to get loans, utilities and credit cards with NO problem. But then again it could also just be that it is just THAT easy to obtain credit. We had agreed that having no credit is almost just as bad as having bad credit. That's why we both agreed for me to start establishing credit at 18 also. And yeah I do agree that considering my experience and yours I don't get how it is hard it is to get credit. Cause it was easy as pie for me! I have a friend who has some money saved up and had planned on saving up more and getting a car next year. I told her that she NEEDS to establish some kind of credit in order to do that. I suggested for her to get a store charge card from Macy's buy little things each month for a few months and make sure she pays if off full before the due date (She works and lives by a mall also and should have no problems making an in store cash payment for the bill). And then applying for a major credit card and do the same with buying little things and paying it off to build up her credit. I won't tell her to get more than one credit card right now though cause this girl is also a spender!

He usually doesn't make many or if any purchases with any of his credit cards, he likes to use cash or gift cards (The big grocery store here has a fuelperks program where for a limited time for every $50 of store gift cards you purchase from them to places like Best Buy and Macy's you get $0.20 off each gallon of gas. This grocery store also has their own chain of gas stations which is where you redeem your gas discount at. He's gotten $356 of free gas within a period of months cause he's been making mad purchases at Best Buy for his friends and just having them pay him back in cash.). But lately he's been using his credit cards more cause of special offers and deals that they have when you buy at this place or that place. 

My Visa (I have two) and Mastercard have a limit of $6,500-$8,000. While the new Discover card I got only has a limit of $2,000 cause they had asked if I was a student and if I had a job and I said no to both. But I can see that they won't really have much of an issue raising it once I get a job and start bringing income in. But I don't want the limit increased not for a while at least. 

I also only use the Store charge cards from Sears and Macy's whenever they are having a sale that you can only redeem when you use their store charge card. It's nice cause you can get some stuff cheaper than it already is sometimes and you can pay your bill in store also with cash. You don't have to mail any checks in or do any online bill pay if those aren't convenient payment methods for you. At the time I had opened those cards, I didn't have a bank account so no online bill pay or checks. I was just as Victoria's Secret the other day and the SA asked if I had a Victoria's Secret charge card. I've heard about it and how you get a coupon book with deals and free panty offers each month. I thought about it but told her no. But it does sound like a good deal lol..

My dad and I don't debit like EVER. He has a debit card that the bank sent him but he never called to activate it. He's going to destroy it soon so that it doesn't get into the wrong hands in case he loses his wallet or whatever. I'd suggest that he also call the bank up and cancel the debit account too just so his "info" isn't just out there somewhere. When he showed me the debit card, he didn't know what it was ROFL 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




So I had to explain to him how debit works and he's just like HELL NAH, I'm not okay with that. Hahaha I've gotta love the man! Me and him have very similiar spending habits and we both know that we'd end up with like a million dollar overdraft fee if we used a debit card lol.


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## x33cupcake (Mar 7, 2009)

i know what you mean, i have spent over 1000 on mac in the past two months.. i'm paying off all my credit cards now and trying to not make any more purchases. so far i've been going good :] i dont have that much debt anymore..


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 8, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *x33cupcake* 

 
_i know what you mean, i have spent over 1000 on mac in the past two months.. i'm paying off all my credit cards now and trying to not make any more purchases. so far i've been going good :] i dont have that much debt anymore.._

 
I wish I could spend that much on MAC! With my new job my makeup/beauty budget is set at $150 a month =[. It's more than I'll be making in a week though. 

It's good that you've paid it off don't want that to roll onto the next month and the next! Interest rates are the devil.


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## coachkitten (Mar 8, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_I even refused a debit card and an ATM card from the bank cause they don't make me feel safe._

 
I just wanted to say that bank debit cards are just as safe as credit cards if not safer as they have a personal pin attached.  It might be a good option to use a debit card as you can only spend what you have in your account.  Just a thought though.

When I was in college I got my first credit card against my better judgement and the limit was over $5000!!  I have no clue how I qualified for one that big and being a student and having only a small part time job I ended up maxing out my card pretty fast.  

I also have an addictive personality so I have to really be on top of what I am spending as I can go overboard pretty quickly.  I love my handbags and makeup but now I limit myself only to buy within my monthly budget.  I also now only have ONE major credit card and a debit card.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 8, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *coachkitten* 

 
_I just wanted to say that bank debit cards are just as safe as credit cards if not safer as they have a personal pin attached.  It might be a good option to use a debit card as you can only spend what you have in your account.  Just a thought though.

When I was in college I got my first credit card against my better judgement and the limit was over $5000!!  I have no clue how I qualified for one that big and being a student and having only a small part time job I ended up maxing out my card pretty fast.  

I also have an addictive personality so I have to really be on top of what I am spending as I can go overboard pretty quickly.  I love my handbags and makeup but now I limit myself only to buy within my monthly budget.  I also now only have ONE major credit card and a debit card._

 
I have to agree that debit cards work usually okay for most people. But my dad and I never cash all of our paychecks/money til the end of the month or even the next month sometimes. Direct deposit maybe an option at my new job for me but it isn't for my dad's job. So we don't really have much in the bank usually until we cash every single thing we have in there. 

I swear they give us young kids ridiculous limits in the hopes that we'll charge up our cards in no time and go beyond our limit. This all means moolah for the credit card companies! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 I seen this epidose of CSI Miami and I'm not sure if this actually happens in real life. But this credit card company has a group of workers who go to campuses and literally prey on kids there that don't know much about credit. They'll make it super easy for them to get a credit card and then the next month they'll raise their limit to some ridiculous amount and the kids will think that they can just keep charging up the card cause of their high limit. But when they can't pay they start harassing them and threatening them. 

Oh my, I hope I don't get into handbags EVER. Like deisigner ones. Have mercy on my wallet lol.


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## coachkitten (Mar 8, 2009)

That is exactly what they did at my college.  They were on our mall (main part of campus) and offered free gifts if you signed up.  A lot of people would get those cards as they had the school mascot on it and then they would give you a HUGE credit limit and continually raise it.  It is actually pretty scary now that I look back on it.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 8, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *coachkitten* 

 
_That is exactly what they did at my college.  They were on our mall (main part of campus) and offered free gifts if you signed up.  A lot of people would get those cards as they had the school mascot on it and then they would give you a HUGE credit limit and continually raise it.  It is actually pretty scary now that I look back on it._

 
Wow, I guess that it really does happen in real life then...

This has probably has to be part of the strain on economy. People borrowing money that they literally can't pay back. I can't totally blame those people cause in a way they were being "set up" by the companies with all the temptations and high limits.


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## LMD84 (Mar 8, 2009)

oh yeah my credit card company put up my limit every so often and every time i log into my ieternet banking and lower the limit agian. what's annoying is that they never seem to get the messgae i don't want the money! i don't want the temptation of having a big limit again! they never tell you they're doing it either... they just put it up like it's a nice little surprise for you


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## User49 (Mar 8, 2009)

I used to be a complete shopaholic. I'm a lot better now. It catches up with you. And eventually you will regret it all because you will get a paycheck and realize that over 80% of it goes towards paying of debt that you can't control and that just keeps growing if you only pay off the minimum payments. 

I know the thrill of shopping. I used to spend every lunch break out in shops. Every day off I would be out in shops and I'd be making new shopping lists everyday. The only reason I stopped is because I couldn't get ahold of any more money and then I realized how much a mess I had gotten myself into.

As fun as it is to do it and as fun as it feels to get new things... eventually you realize it comes at a price. Be careful! x


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 8, 2009)

Grrrr, I'm still waiting for stupid Discover to send me my temporary log in name and password so I can start monitoring stuff online. Idk what is making it take so long?! 

I just whipped out my calculator (well more like did a few clicks on my computer hehe) and did some calculations which include tax for how much I'm looking to be charging tomorrow for the HK Kouture Collection and some other regular HK items, and yeah...I'm looking at slightly OVER $300. Fucking hell. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			







 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *LMD84* 

 
_oh yeah my credit card company put up my limit every so often and every time i log into my ieternet banking and lower the limit agian. what's annoying is that they never seem to get the messgae i don't want the money! i don't want the temptation of having a big limit again! they never tell you they're doing it either... they just put it up like it's a nice little surprise for you_

 
It's pure trickery I say! They don't seem to care what we want or what is best for us customers, they just want our cash $$ lol.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 8, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *glitternmyveins* 

 
_I used to be a complete shopaholic. I'm a lot better now. It catches up with you. And eventually you will regret it all because you will get a paycheck and realize that over 80% of it goes towards paying of debt that you can't control and that just keeps growing if you only pay off the minimum payments. 

I know the thrill of shopping. I used to spend every lunch break out in shops. Every day off I would be out in shops and I'd be making new shopping lists everyday. The only reason I stopped is because I couldn't get ahold of any more money and then I realized how much a mess I had gotten myself into.

As fun as it is to do it and as fun as it feels to get new things... eventually you realize it comes at a price. Be careful! x_

 
I had promised myself that I would never make any minimum payments if I could suck it up and make a full payment so I don't get charged even more money. But yeah I see how it is starting to all catch up with me. Cause I just constantly want more more more! 

I think that when I'm older and have to take care of two older parents and a household that this needs to be cut down a lot. Now I'm probably going to have to cheap out on a lot of things in order to still spend on things I want. But it's so stressful and you worry a lot. The "thrill" of it just gets me though.


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## User49 (Mar 8, 2009)

Yeah I understand. I live with my boyfriend and we rent a house and I find we have to really cut back as we both got into debt. It makes me really regret it all because now when I get paid that money that goes towards paying off all my cards could have been spent on getting furniture for our house, going out with friends for a drink after work, clothes that i desperately need for work. It's very easy to push to the back of your mind that little voice that says 'don't spend money'. I think that if you feel the need to post about it you feel that you acknowledge the problem but I think most shopohoics think the same. Until it gets to rock bottom you don't let yourself stop. It's like 'well i'm already in this much debt so a little top or a eyeshadow wont make a difference.' and when all my friends urged me not to get more cards out I just blindly got more and just spent so much money and now I'm like "woah!" I also felt really guilty and that helped me stop. Like theres so many people in the world with absolutely nothing to show for themselves and yet they're still happy. And I'd just consistently want more more more. It's just a way of dealing with things that you get into a habit. I think it's a stress release. And also the society we live in doesn't really help... to be in trend and in fashion you have to consistently buy the new things on the highstreet and there's just no way I can afford to do that much anymore. I'm having to really stretch my mind and be createive  with clothes to create an image that works for me. I really think shopping is just a form of like therapy for some. But like I said...try and stop while you can as it will catch up with you! Good luck! x


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 8, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *glitternmyveins* 

 
_Yeah I understand. I live with my boyfriend and we rent a house and I find we have to really cut back as we both got into debt. It makes me really regret it all because now when I get paid that money that goes towards paying off all my cards could have been spent on getting furniture for our house, going out with friends for a drink after work, clothes that i desperately need for work. It's very easy to push to the back of your mind that little voice that says 'don't spend money'. I think that if you feel the need to post about it you feel that you acknowledge the problem but I think most shopohoics think the same. Until it gets to rock bottom you don't let yourself stop. It's like 'well i'm already in this much debt so a little top or a eyeshadow wont make a difference.' and when all my friends urged me not to get more cards out I just blindly got more and just spent so much money and now I'm like "woah!" I also felt really guilty and that helped me stop. Like theres so many people in the world with absolutely nothing to show for themselves and yet they're still happy. And I'd just consistently want more more more. It's just a way of dealing with things that you get into a habit. I think it's a stress release. And also the society we live in doesn't really help... to be in trend and in fashion you have to consistently buy the new things on the highstreet and there's just no way I can afford to do that much anymore. I'm having to really stretch my mind and be createive  with clothes to create an image that works for me. I really think shopping is just a form of like therapy for some. But like I said...try and stop while you can as it will catch up with you! Good luck! x_

 
It's such a nasty habit. I can already see whats going to happen when I'm older. I won't be able to afford a lot of the things that most people can like furniture, home phone service, and I'll be cracking down really hard with electricity and water cause I don't want to pay a lot for those things. All this just so I can go out and shop. It's horrible. 

Shopping is my form of coping with stress. I mean yeah it's fun but I do it more when I'm stressed which is most of the time. I don't feel like I have anything else to turn to. Not going to do drugs or drink. No partying. So it's kind of like uhh what else is left for me to do? I'm already at the point where I'm afraid even shopping won't be enough. Then what? Scares me.


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## xxManBeaterxx (Mar 8, 2009)

I have just 2 credit cards.  Visa and American Express.  I use my american express _only_ for gas since i get 7% cash back.  I use my visa when i go gorcery shopping.  But it gets paid off every month, since its not worth paying the interest..  I can't even stress how important it is to have good credit...

Every 2 weeks we with draw money, and thats all we limit ourselves to when we go shopping.  Paying cash makes you realize how much you are spending because the money is physically dissapearing... So you go whoa.. i need to stop or think twice about buying a new pair of shoes.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 8, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *xxManBeaterxx* 

 
_I have just 2 credit cards.  Visa and American Express.  I use my american express only for gas since i get 7% cash back.  I use my visa when i go gorcery shopping.  But it gets paid off every month, since its not worth paying the interest..  I can't even stress how important it is to have good credit...

Every 2 weeks we with draw money, and thats all we limit ourselves to when we go shopping.  Paying cash makes you realize how much you are spending because the money is physically dissapearing... So you go whoa.. i need to stop or think twice about buying a new pair of shoes._

 
7% cashback for gas? That's a good deal. I'm eligible for cashback on my Discover card. I might just let my dad use it when he goes grocery shopping so we can rack up some points. 

I had quite a few people blow off the importance of credit like it was nothing. I was just like what?! They check your credit for a ton of things. Like my friend who is trying to start to get a car next year. She has no credit, and well unless she can pay for the car in whole upfront, it's not happening. She needs credit. But once you screw up your credit then that's just really BAD. 

Every time I use a calculator and start punching in the numbers I realize more and more that these aren't just numbers anymore but it's MONEY. But still kicking the habit isn't going to be easy. I can't til I get my whole months worth of paychecks and I can figure out how much I make and start budgeting. I need a set amount of cash that I am allowed to spend on x y and z and the rest has to be saved up.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 9, 2009)

Just 5 minutes ago I was weak and decided to visit the Bank of America site for the HK credit card application. I filled it out halfway but decided to stop and quickly exed out. 

Man, I'm so weak =[


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## BloopBloop (Mar 9, 2009)

as for the cash back thing, you have to read the fine print and terms and conditions... my stupid ass signed up for it thinking i was going to get a check in the mail for all the money i would spend... alas, i was naive and found out recently that it would be cash back to an online citibank shopping site, where all the money you're "getting back" is put there and you can only spend it at that site... and you cant even spend it all in one shot-- depending on the item, they either let you pay partly from your pocket, or let you have it for free but you have to pay the shipping. i was so mad...


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 10, 2009)

^^ Wtf, I'm scared now...I hate when companies pull that on you! It's like lying to us in order for us to sign up with them. 

My dad and I went out shopping yesterday and yeah we racked up $540 cause of the cashback thing. Plus he got mad points for buying several hundred dollars worth of giftcards from our local grocery store that does the fuelperk program. I think he's going to get $2.60 off every gallon of gas now (gas here is only like $1.80-$1.95). I'm scared now that they won't give me my money. Cause the ad I had seen for the Discover card said that if you spent $500 within the first 3 months of being approved you'll get $100 cashback. The lady I spoke to on the phone when I activated my card said that I would get the money in $20 increments everytime I spent $100 and that I could use it towards either a credit to my account, get a check for it in the mail, or redeem it for giftcards. Ahhh, this is all just so "iffy"...


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## NutMeg (Mar 10, 2009)

Out of curiousity, what is the benefit of having multiple credit cards? I've only got the one, and I really don't see why I would get more.


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## BloopBloop (Mar 10, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *NutMeg* 

 
_Out of curiousity, what is the benefit of having multiple credit cards? I've only got the one, and I really don't see why I would get more._

 
its to spend more money... i was 18 when i first got my credit cards (three within the first month.) I got one for the air mileage points (after more than $4000 dollars on it, i dont even have enough to fly to buffalo, and i live in NYC!!!)

i got the other one for the fake cash back, and the first one was just the first card.

like i said, i was naive! at that time, i didnt know what shopping therapy and addictions were


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 11, 2009)

I have really unrealistic fears seriously. I'm afraid that if I go somewhere and lets say something big happened and it's an emergency and I don't have enough cash on me to cover it, I'll have to put it on credit. But not all places accept every form of credit like Sam's Club takes everything BUT Visa. This has me all freaked out for some reason.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 15, 2009)

Soooo I'm TERRIBLE.

I owe close to $600. I've just had such a temptation to just shop shop shop. And I'm afraid that Victoria Secret is going to be my new thing besides MAC which isn't a cheap habit to keep up with. BUT I'm only buying the cheap stuff there and I've been getting some discounts with coupons and stuff. Still not good though. Can't wait til I get paid!

Really after this and paying my parents back I need to seriously slow the fuck down with this spending. I'm already super stressed and constantly worrying and this spending isn't helping really at the end of the day.


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## abbyquack (Mar 15, 2009)

Thanks for this thread, this is kind of where I'm at right now. I have had periods of major irresponsibility, then times when I didn't even touch a CC, and if I did I paid it off in full after every purchase (for rewards points, it actually ends up being a good deal- I've gotten $160 for free to spend at Nordstrom in 6mos!). Right now I'm carrying a $2000+ balance on my visa. It is horrible and so stressful. I don't want to even look at things to buy anymore, don't want to eat out anymore, because I'm sick of spending $$. As we speak I'm going through my closet to find new outfit combinations, things I haven't worn in a while, so I don't go buy new clothes. 

And, I'm surprised to read about all the super easily obtained credit! I always felt like credit was kinda hard for me to get...I have several ccs, but they all have had small limits (like $500) until maybe 1 or 2 years ago. But I remember calling up several ccs asking for credit increases and never being able to get them! It's a good thing they didn't I guess.


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## BloopBloop (Mar 16, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *abbyquack* 

 
_Thanks for this thread, this is kind of where I'm at right now. I have had periods of major irresponsibility, then times when I didn't even touch a CC, and if I did I paid it off in full after every purchase (for rewards points, it actually ends up being a good deal- I've gotten $160 for free to spend at Nordstrom in 6mos!). Right now I'm carrying a $2000+ balance on my visa. It is horrible and so stressful. I don't want to even look at things to buy anymore, don't want to eat out anymore, because I'm sick of spending $$. As we speak I'm going through my closet to find new outfit combinations, things I haven't worn in a while, so I don't go buy new clothes. 

And, I'm surprised to read about all the super easily obtained credit! I always felt like credit was kinda hard for me to get...I have several ccs, but they all have had small limits (like $500) until maybe 1 or 2 years ago. But I remember calling up several ccs asking for credit increases and never being able to get them! It's a good thing they didn't I guess._

 
they like to start college students off with high limits because they are irresponsible (most of the time) and end up getting spend-happy. thats good news to the CC companies.

i have really bad irresponsible phases as well... like i'll be good at savin up and not charging things.. and then i'll feel so good that i feel i should treat myself to a nice little haul... *sigh * CC are credit death traps

IS THERE ANY WAY TO LOWER YOUR LIMIT?! THEY KEEP INCREASING MINE!!


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## NutMeg (Mar 16, 2009)

I've got a pretty high limit on mine, because one of the things I use it for is paying for my housing fees online. So I have a $2000 limit, and the highest I've ever had on it was around $1100. That was in December, because I got presents and plane tickets home, which my parents reimbursed me for. Seriously, $600 dollars for a one hour flight? *grumbles*

My rule for my card is that I only use it for essentials, not fun stuff. So groceries, my phone bills, things like that. Unless something comes up (like plane tickets, or having to pay housing fees) I can usually keep my balance between $200-$300 every month, which I pay off in full. That way I can get a credit rating without going in debt. 

For those of you who have a card to get a good credit rating, remember that you're not going to accomplish that by not paying off the balance in full every month.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 17, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *abbyquack* 

 
_Thanks for this thread, this is kind of where I'm at right now. I have had periods of major irresponsibility, then times when I didn't even touch a CC, and if I did I paid it off in full after every purchase (for rewards points, it actually ends up being a good deal- I've gotten $160 for free to spend at Nordstrom in 6mos!). Right now I'm carrying a $2000+ balance on my visa. It is horrible and so stressful. I don't want to even look at things to buy anymore, don't want to eat out anymore, because I'm sick of spending $$. As we speak I'm going through my closet to find new outfit combinations, things I haven't worn in a while, so I don't go buy new clothes. 

And, I'm surprised to read about all the super easily obtained credit! I always felt like credit was kinda hard for me to get...I have several ccs, but they all have had small limits (like $500) until maybe 1 or 2 years ago. But I remember calling up several ccs asking for credit increases and never being able to get them! It's a good thing they didn't I guess._

 
 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *BloopBloop* 

 
_they like to start college students off with high limits because they are irresponsible (most of the time) and end up getting spend-happy. thats good news to the CC companies.

i have really bad irresponsible phases as well... like i'll be good at savin up and not charging things.. and then i'll feel so good that i feel i should treat myself to a nice little haul... *sigh * CC are credit death traps

IS THERE ANY WAY TO LOWER YOUR LIMIT?! THEY KEEP INCREASING MINE!!_

 
 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *NutMeg* 

 
_I've got a pretty high limit on mine, because one of the things I use it for is paying for my housing fees online. So I have a $2000 limit, and the highest I've ever had on it was around $1100. That was in December, because I got presents and plane tickets home, which my parents reimbursed me for. Seriously, $600 dollars for a one hour flight? *grumbles*

My rule for my card is that I only use it for essentials, not fun stuff. So groceries, my phone bills, things like that. Unless something comes up (like plane tickets, or having to pay housing fees) I can usually keep my balance between $200-$300 every month, which I pay off in full. That way I can get a credit rating without going in debt. 

For those of you who have a card to get a good credit rating, remember that you're not going to accomplish that by not paying off the balance in full every month._

 
As of this moment I owe $243 and some odd cents on my Mastercard and $530ish on my Discover card. Now $200 of the amount owed on my Discover card was from using it to buy giftcards (our local grocery store has an AMAZING fuelperks program and when buying gift cards for different stores from them can also rack up points) to purchase some stuff for a friend of my dads from Sears. Now obviously we'll get reimbursed for that money we used to get that stuff. So that takes down my Discover balance to $330ish. Thank goodness my parents are willing to pay the bills for the cards off for me and I can pay them back after I start getting paid from work. I use my cc to buy stuff that we need around the house like napkins, medicine, batteries, etc. 

I haven't exactly been taking away the "tempations" away cause I keep going out and currently work at a drugstore and always seem to find something interesting to try to buy. And I was totally right my new obsession now is Victoria's Secret sadly. But like I said I have been finding a lot of coupons for freebies and discounts from them and using them as much as I can. I've been doing the same for other stores too mainly for freebies that don't require any purchase or ones where you can buy ANYTHING even a little $1 lollipop to get a free gift. Just yesterday I went out to VS and got the 7 for $25 deal with a free pair of panties and the girl who rung me up only charged me for 6 of the 1 for $25 panties so that was kind of good lol. I also got a bra for $35 after discount that I'm definitely going to be taking back. IF I do exchange the bra for another one I'll make sure I'll have another coupon ready and pick out something much nicer and cheaper there cause there 36c sizes actually fit me decently. I swore I would never touch a VS bra a while back cause of the prices but yeah... look where I'm at now lol.

I also signed up for their VS angels credit card...
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. The girl did tell me that I could use the card and then tell who ever is checking me out that I wanted to pay for the balance right there and then. That way I can still earn rewards and get special offers. Anyone have one as well? They gave me a limit of $1000. I did some research online and noticed that they only really usually give out a limit of $250-$500 to people for that. 

Credit seems to be sooo easy to obtain and even easier to mess up these days! 

My $164 Nordstrom's haul just came to me in the mail yesterday. I loved it and dreaded it at the same time. My mom knew all about it and we both agreed it would be best to hide the box from my dad and not mention a thing to him cause yeah he'd fucking flip. 

My mom has suggested that I start to use cash more but I explained to her again my big fear of having money stolen out of my wallet (it's happened before and the theif even took the coupon I had in there with them lol!). We agreed that the max I'd carry most of the time would be around $30 and only use my cc if I REALLY REALLY need it.


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## NutMeg (Mar 17, 2009)

Two suggestions. One, this:

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_I haven't exactly been taking away the "tempations" away cause I keep going out and currently work at a drugstore and always seem to find something interesting to try to buy.* And I was totally right my new obsession now is Victoria's Secret sadly.* But like I said I have been finding a lot of coupons for freebies and discounts from them and using them as much as I can. I've been doing the same for other stores too mainly for freebies that don't require any purchase or ones where you can buy ANYTHING even a little $1 lollipop to get a free gift. Just yesterday I went out to VS and got the 7 for $25 deal with a free pair of panties and the girl who rung me up only charged me for 6 of the 1 for $25 panties so that was kind of good lol. I also got a bra for $35 after discount that I'm definitely going to be taking back. IF I do exchange the bra for another one I'll make sure I'll have another coupon ready and pick out something much nicer and cheaper there cause there 36c sizes actually fit me decently. I swore I would never touch a VS bra a while back cause of the prices but yeah... look where I'm at now lol._

 
makes it sound like buying Victoria's Secret is something that is happening to you, not a choice you're making. That kind of thinking is dangerous, not accepting responsibility for your purchases is part of how you get into debt. You chose to buy that stuff, when you say that unfortunately you have a new obsession... It's all you baby. 

Two,

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_My mom has suggested that I start to use cash more but I explained to her again my big fear of having money stolen out of my wallet (it's happened before and the theif even took the coupon I had in there with them lol!). We agreed that the max I'd carry most of the time would be around $30 and only use my cc if I REALLY REALLY need it._

 
Make a list of what counts as something that you REALLY REALLY need to use your card for. Print it out, wrap your card in it. When you're out and about, if you feel like buying something with your card look at the list. If it isn't on the list, don't buy it. Otherwise, if you don't have the cash or enough on your debit card, you can't get it.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 17, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *NutMeg* 

 
_Two suggestions. One, this:



makes it sound like buying Victoria's Secret is something that is happening to you, not a choice you're making. That kind of thinking is dangerous, not accepting responsibility for your purchases is part of how you get into debt. You chose to buy that stuff, when you say that unfortunately you have a new obsession... It's all you baby. 

Two,



Make a list of what counts as something that you REALLY REALLY need to use your card for. Print it out, wrap your card in it. When you're out and about, if you feel like buying something with your card look at the list. If it isn't on the list, don't buy it. Otherwise, if you don't have the cash or enough on your debit card, you can't get it._

 
Yep, in my head I keep imagining all these cute little things that I can buy all calling out to me for me to buy them. Stupid, but its soo true. But yeah it's just *ALL* me. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





 I guess in my head this makes the spending seem much more acceptable and justifiable. 

Thats such a good idea. I'm writing down stuff right now that I ACTUALLY SERIOUSLY REALLY NEED not want. And they are:

a hair cut 
pair of tennis shoes
some bras that actually fit me (I got measured as a 36C at VS, so I'll use that as reference so I can go out to like Wally's world and grab a couple of cheap ones.)
sulfate free shampoo and conditioner (I have sulfate sensitivities on my face and it already is starting to occasionally cause painful flare ups and irritation on my scalp)

And really that's about all I need besides food, water, and shelter when I truly think about it.


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## Mizz.Coppertone (Mar 23, 2009)

ugh yes the past few weeks i really wish i saved more then i spent. whenever i get depressed i spend so much $$$ on new beauty/hair/skin products because i think it will help me feel better.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 27, 2009)

^^ Yeah...everytime I feel like shit, I just have to go out and buy more.

I just feel like dying..I don't even want to look at my online accounts cause I'm probably at least $1,000 in the hole right now. And I make like NOTHING at my job.


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## BloopBloop (Mar 27, 2009)

^ did you go out and spend more money after your sale?!  >=O 

and yea, shopping therapy is the beezneez!


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## seonmi (Mar 27, 2009)

My advice is not go to the malls, online shopping sites, and all the deals ... Then you are not aware of good deals and not have to resist the temptation. I had a hard time at first, too. But now not going to the malls, staying away from LJ, the sale section on here, and the lemmings threads on here and MUA has helped a lot.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 27, 2009)

Yep, I went out and spent A TON after the sale. I actually have been really lazy with it cause I'm just so exhausted from work. Work has been sooo tiring, and 8 hours feels more like 24 hours when your stuck there. So I've been hitting the mall which is right by Walgreens where I work at a lot. I do it as a rewards I guess...Not so much. More like a punishment now. 

I might get another job on top of this if I'm able to. The manager at Victoria Secret told one of the SA's there to give me an application the next time I came into the store cause she liked me. Still wouldn't be good though....being around all those goodies. I already buy all kinds of knickknacks from work! 

It's hard for me to not shop somehow or be in places where you can shop. Considering I live by so many stores and a mall plus theres the internet. Ughh. But I think that now that I got my first paycheck and realize how much I DON'T make I'll start nipping this in the butt soon. I just hope soon enough. 

I seriously broke down and cried earlier today after looking at my online accounts and realizing that there were still pending purchases that haven't posted up yet. Luckily, the boy was nice enough to call me back and talk to a hysterical me and willing to come over a little bit for comfort me. He's been lecturing me too about my spending telling me that all of this is not worth getting into thousands and thousands of dollars in debt...


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## Fataliya (Mar 28, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *BloopBloop* 

 
_its to spend more money... i was 18 when i first got my credit cards (three within the first month.) I got one for the air mileage points (after more than $4000 dollars on it, i dont even have enough to fly to buffalo, and i live in NYC!!!)

i got the other one for the fake cash back, and the first one was just the first card.

like i said, i was naive! at that time, i didnt know what shopping therapy and addictions were
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 
Actually, the advantage to more than one card is in your credit profile/score. 

If you have one card with a $10k limit, and $5k on that, your utilization is at 50%. If you have lots of cards, with that same balance spread amongst them, you can have lower utilization, which means higher credit score. 

Generally speaking, that is. There are always exceptions to the rule, lol.

High utilization is a score killer.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 30, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Fataliya* 

 
_Actually, the advantage to more than one card is in your credit profile/score. 

If you have one card with a $10k limit, and $5k on that, your utilization is at 50%. If you have lots of cards, with that same balance spread amongst them, you can have lower utilization, which means higher credit score. 

Generally speaking, that is. There are always exceptions to the rule, lol.

High utilization is a score killer._

 
So the more cards the better for your credit score?

More cards = death for me from going broke =[


I'm going to stop these trips to the mall seriously. No more ebay. No more sale thread visits. And maybe just no more MAC for a while.


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## almmaaa (Mar 31, 2009)

I just hope you really stick to it because it seems like your not I just read thru the 3 pages and everyone is giving you advice but your not following it, your still spending, you gotta stop cold turkey just say to yourself you are stronger than this my father always tells me dont buy anything, you have so many things you dont need anything what you need is MONEY!!!!


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## NutMeg (Mar 31, 2009)

^Agreed. The reality is that you don't deserve anything beyond your basic rights that you haven't earned... and you haven't earned any of the things you're buying. You're spending someone else's money, and I'm getting the impression that you don't really want to stop.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Mar 31, 2009)

I'm not gonna lie. I LOVE shopping. I think everyone does lol. 

It's just that I keep doing it over and over again too frequently in such a short span of time. I honestly can't say that I won't shop at all like ever again. It just needs to be turned down like a 100 notches cause what's been going on is TOO MUCH. Regular 2-4 visits maximum to the mall a month that didn't involve spending too much money have now turned into 2-4 times a week. 

I guess the bottom line is no, I don't want to stop shopping. I just want it to be on a level that is affordable and reasonable for me. No more careless spending at every single store. No more worrying about how am I going to pay this and that off on time. I want to be able to enjoy it occasionally but not have to worry about those types of things. 

I have $1.42 in my bank account right now so that they don't close my account. I took out all the money I made from my most recent paycheck and tax return. Tomorrow all of that money is going towards paying off one of the credit cards I had been using. I'm going to have to be doing this for the next what...2 or 3 months I think? Plus I'm hoping to pick up this other job (not VS, I already realized that that would not be a good idea) to get some more money. Now all of that does not make me feel good in the least bit.


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## Fataliya (Apr 1, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_So the more cards the better for your credit score?

More cards = death for me from going broke =[


I'm going to stop these trips to the mall seriously. No more ebay. No more sale thread visits. And maybe just no more MAC for a while._

 
Generally speaking, yes...IF you practice caution and care with them. If you have, say, $20k in AVAILABLE credit, but you've only charged $500, then you have low utilization, which can help your score.

I'm a member of a credit repair forum (everything there is free, btw), and I spent an entire year repairing mine and hubby's credit, only to have it destroyed when he got sick and almost died, and we ended up losing our house.

So, long story short, yes, more cards are good for your score, but only if you are very smart with them. Someone that gets $20k in credit and then maxes them out will be screwed score wise.


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## Fataliya (Apr 1, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_I'm not gonna lie. I LOVE shopping. I think everyone does lol. 

It's just that I keep doing it over and over again too frequently in such a short span of time. I honestly can't say that I won't shop at all like ever again. It just needs to be turned down like a 100 notches cause what's been going on is TOO MUCH. Regular 2-4 visits maximum to the mall a month that didn't involve spending too much money have now turned into 2-4 times a week. 

I guess the bottom line is no, I don't want to stop shopping. I just want it to be on a level that is affordable and reasonable for me. No more careless spending at every single store. No more worrying about how am I going to pay this and that off on time. I want to be able to enjoy it occasionally but not have to worry about those types of things. 

I have $1.42 in my bank account right now so that they don't close my account. I took out all the money I made from my most recent paycheck and tax return. Tomorrow all of that money is going towards paying off one of the credit cards I had been using. I'm going to have to be doing this for the next what...2 or 3 months I think? Plus I'm hoping to pick up this other job (not VS, I already realized that that would not be a good idea) to get some more money. Now all of that does not make me feel good in the least bit._

 
I think the easiest (well, easiest to figure out, perhaps not easiest to actually DO), is to only buy what you can afford to PAY IN FULL when the bill comes. If you want to charge $100, and you can afford to PIF, then do it. But that means, make sure your essential life bills are paid first (food, water, electricity, etc.)

But you can't do that until your balances are paid off, hun.


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## luvsic (Apr 2, 2009)

Girl I hear you. My parents' eyes boggled out of their heads when they saw my monthly bill...all spent on clothes too. My advice is to make an excel spreadsheet. I have done this for myself and it has helped tremendously. Already I have overspent this month, so I already cut myself off and haven't been spending lately, until I get my bill. 

Here is what I do:

EVERY time you spend something, keep the receipt and write down exactly how much you've spent on the sheet. Give yourself a limit each month (or in my case with each paycheck I get) and check and update that sheet weekly, if not daily. This way, you will know where your money is going so you don't wake up one day wondering why you don't have anymore!

Good luck, please ask if you have any more questions or need details on starting a spreadsheet!


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## Fataliya (Apr 2, 2009)

Another trick I've read about:

Get a tupperware container and fill it with water. Put your credit cards inside. Stick the container in the freezer.

When you want to buy something, you will have to wait for the big ass iceberg to melt. THAT will give you time to THINK about that possible purchase.

Another idea? Cut the damn cards up and just DONT USE THEM ANYMORE. You can't use what you don't have.


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## X4biddenxLustX (Apr 4, 2009)

Again thanks ladies!

I just paid off my Mastercard on the 1st, it was paid in full. Cause it was $526 and with interest I would of been charged over $100. A lot of people have been telling me to just pay off the minimum every month or as much as I can without paying in full. But interest would seriously kill me. So I'm glad that card is taken care of. I just have my Macy's, VS, and Discover these next 2 months to worry about. I'm scared to look at how much I owe on those. But I just want to get it all done and over with. This really is insane. 

I don't want to add anything else to these credit cards cause it's never going to end if I don't nip it in the butt now. I just won't go out all that much anymore. My mom had suggested that if I wanted to go out to the mall or wherever to just go and window shop. Window shopping always turns into real shopping for me though. My mom can do it without spending at all and being tempted but I can't for sure. I can't quite completely explain it, but basically when I shop I'm a different person in a good way. I'm not stressing out at that moment, I'm carefree, and so relaxed. I'm never that way any other time in my life. It just feels so damn good. That's the hardest part about stopping this.


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## exoticarbcqen (Apr 8, 2009)

wow, some of the things I have been reading in this thread are insane. People are living WAY BEYOND there means. If you are making $8/hr part time and have $800-$1000+ debt you are carrying on your credit cards + 10-25% interest rate...that to me is beyond careless and irresponsible. No material object is worth going into debt for, if you cant pay for it in CASH then guess what? you CANT AFFORD IT. end of story. No wonder the US is in its current economic state..because we have millions of people trying to keep up with the joneses', when they are making 1/4 of what they spend....gross.


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## User49 (Apr 8, 2009)

Yeah I agree but as someone who has been there and back i compleatly understand. Weather it be with the latest mac make up or the latest car or the lastest all saints dress i think shopping makes people feel good. And I have to say I blame a lot of companies! How can a credit card company justify giving a 18 year old for example $5000 when they have no real reason for it? Of course they're going to spend it all in one go! Iti's really sad that this is how it is. I don't even think a lot of people are trying to 'keep up with the joneses", I think a lot of people just want new stuff. It's not like a reality check that they can't afford it makes a difference when there are logos, advertisements everywhere saying 'have a credit card'. Like for example the master card advertisements "life is easier with mastercard"... it's all too easy to get into debt. In all honesty I don't think I know anyone who doesn't have debt...


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## X4biddenxLustX (Apr 9, 2009)

^^ I totally agree. 

Sounds crazy but I'm at a meh point in my life and shopping is one of the very few things that gives me that little moment of happiness. The shittier I feel the more I shop. Wow...typing that just made me realize how unhappy I am about my life right now. Not to get off topic but I just have so much going on and I don't know how to deal with it. So I guess this shopping is a way of distraction..?

And those sales and promotions are killers seriously. My excuse had been that there is such a good deal going on, I can't miss it. But then I go overboard with it instead of just getting 1 or 2 little things I walk out with like 10 things. Not good. I'm having another moment of realization....I have too much crap. I really don't need anymore. 

Has anyone felt like there is a pressure to keep up with appearances? Like wearing the nicest this or that. I live in a richer area but come from an average modest income. And I just can't help sometimes but feel jealous of those girls with like 15 bags of things in their hands around the mall. ALL designer and expensive stuff. I just wanted to be able to have that feeling just once. Now its enough. 

I'm about to start my second job soon hopefully, and possibly work at my mom's work on days when they are under staffed and need an extra hand. I REALLY want to pay these cards off in full.


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## Frosting (Apr 9, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Fataliya* 

 
_I think the easiest (well, easiest to figure out, perhaps not easiest to actually DO), is to only buy what you can afford to PAY IN FULL when the bill comes._

 
This! I don't ever spend money I don't have. To me, that would be way too stressful and I can't imagine doing that to myself, even with a small amount of money. It's so important to learn and exercise self-discipline or you'll get yourself into a world of trouble besides bad debt. It's just a trait that every happy, healthy adult needs to develop. DO NOT blame the credit card companies because they did not make you overspend. You have to take responsibility for your actions or you will never improve.

Also, it's good to have a hobby, a good book, or something that you can distract yourself with when you want to shop. If your time is occupied doing other enjoyable things then you won't be as tempted. Also, limit your time on the internet. Make a mental list of things you want to look at or accomplish and then GET OFF the computer and do something fun and free. Call a friend to hang out with you. Any good friend would be happy to distract you and provide emotional support by making you laugh and engaging in good conversation.

Whatever you do, MAKE A PLAN. Write down the exact steps you're going to do, whatever they may be, to discourage and control the shopping. It might sound silly, but it will make it easier if you're organized and official with yourself about it. It's much harder to blow off at that point. Shopping is not that different from any other addiction and it helps so much to face it and treat it like one. We've all got our issues so it's nothing to be ashamed of. Even if it feels like no one in your "real life" is supporting you or believing in your ability to conquer this, remember that you obviously have people here who care enough to listen to you and be there for you whenever you're having a hard time getting through the day. You can do it!


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## X4biddenxLustX (Apr 9, 2009)

^^

I do agree that I think I'm spending a lot cause I feel as if I have nothing else better to do. I live in the suburbs by a lot of shops. And don't really have any friends that live here. I just don't really mesh well with people here. It's like I can befriend them but never to the point where I can freely let go and be myself, I hope that makes sense. We'd be more like acquaintances really. I miss my friends from my old neighborhood and I am trying to reconnect with them again and make plans to hang out and stuff. But it's been a bit difficult cause we all work, and they go to school and do their own thing. I do really want to make it a goal this summer to hang out with them again and talk to them on a regular basis or as much as we can considering our schedules. Probably another goal is getting my license so I could come out and hang out with people more. That could also lead to me getting a much better job which would just make me feel so much better. 

In the mean while...I'm trying to figure out some things I could start doing as a hobby that don't include spending massive amounts of money or having to be around others. Off the top of my head I could start exercising more, watching movies, learning how to cook. 

I think I probably should be spending more time at home anyways until the end of May so I can be with my mom. She's going away back to China for at least 2 months to see doctors there and I will really miss her. Plus I really don't want to worry her with my spending. She had went through my room and found a TON of things I had bought over the last few months.


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## L1LMAMAJ (Apr 14, 2009)

holy crap. i belong in this thread. i used to buy and buy and buy. sometimes i would rebuy the same shit on accident cuz i forget i already bought it. now i'm trying to desperately sell my shit cuz it's just too much for me. it's overwhelming. i used to buy because i was BORED. sad.

i was in "debt" kind of. just about 1 grand but I paid it off in a timely manner. it accummulated soon after i got my first credit card. i was like OOOOOOOOH i can buy stufffff and get it right now! instant gratification. now i know better. i hardly buy any makeup anymore. i'm just trying to use up my old stuff.


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## exoticarbcqen (Apr 22, 2009)

you cant blame the credit cards for giving people credit, some people actually utilize credit for legitimate purposes ie. unexpected bill, flights, hotels, car rentals etc NOT for frivilous spending like makeup and clothes. I get that people want the newest and hottest stuff, but guess what? there is always going to be something more expensive, better looking, more valuable that even with a $5000 limit you probably wont be able to charge. 

I am no expert, I spend alot of money in Nordstrom's savvy department [true religions, elizabeth & james, mike & chris, christian louboutin shoes, chanel and balenciaga handbags etc etc] but, you NEED to limit yourself. I KNOW I cant walk into Hermes and buy a $15k bag, just because I have the space on a credit card doesn't mean I can afford it. 

you need to take responsibility for your spending, dont blame the credit card companies. They cant help it when people abuse their privileges. That also reminds me of the "fat/obese" people who "sue" fast food chains because it caused them to be fat, or people who sue cigarette companies because it gave them cancer, its just a bullshit excuse to blame everyone else except themselves.


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## LaVixxen (Apr 22, 2009)

pshhh you guys are bragging about owing $1000 Pshhhh lol sadly I owe 14,000. Thats with all my credit cards added up. But its okay before I owed 12,000 and paid it in a year so it isnt too bad. If you can pay it pretty quick I see no big deal.

Shopping sometimes makes a sad person happy. Its like therapy a bad kind of therapy but it doesn't mean you cant indulge in things you want.

My grandma always told me you only live once so do whatever makes you happy. I really dont stress debt. But that's just me, I may come off irresponsible but I do pay it off always before a year or in a year.


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## LadySutcliffe (Apr 22, 2009)

To the OP - I think you are very brave to be so honest about your spending habits, and I wish you all the best with your resolution to pay off your debts and learn to enjoy shopping responsibly.

There are some pretty judgemental comments on here which I'm guessing come from one who have never been in debt themselves. 

Fine, nobody HAS to buy makeup, but it's hard to resist all the constant, stupid materialistic marketing cr** that tells you you are worthless if you don't look a certain way, have a certain thing...especially for young girls now, they see EVERYONE has a designer bag or whatever, whereas when I was growing up only wealthy people had these things. 

Financial institutions lend money to people so they will spend more than they can afford and pay back huge amounts of interest. They are not there to help people, they're there to make money and lots of it, and they have steadily ramped up the amount of credit/mortgage/whatever that people can get, in the sure knowledge people would struggle to pay and they would make obscene amounts of money in interest. Governments should have intervened and they haven't, but now the financial institutions themselves are in trouble they can't do enough to help! Advertisers want our money and have brainwashed us into thinking we "need" things. 

I am not saying that people don't need to take responsibility for their spending, but that is what the OP is doing and we should applaud her for that. 

You never know what life has in store, when you will lose your job, or get ill, and not be able to pay your rent, so I don't think anyone can sit in judgement on people with debt. 

I was ill, couldn't work and got into debt, and it was horrible, it literally kept me awake at night, so I know how it feels. I hope anybody who is in debt gets help to get out of it and I wish you ALL peace and prosperity!


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## BEA2LS (Apr 23, 2009)

i have been there after a bad break up with a boyfriend at the time.
i shopped - designer clothes, designer handbags (LV, coach, dooney), MAC, urban decay,tiffany jewlery, you name it.  i still have no idea why Chase would give someone unemployed such a high credit limit.
but i maxed it out, seriously. and i paid it back and it sucked and now i am so broke i would kill for a credit card i could use for gas and groceries and pay back on payday. but my credit is trashed now.
i understand the shopping thing, just please be careful


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## ginger9 (Apr 23, 2009)

My spending is not out of control but I can give some suggestions as to how to curb impulse buying. 

I used to impulse buy and I became disturbed by the waste since some of it I never wear or use. I'll actually find items weeks/months later still in the shopping bag that I totally forgotten about. Anyway, here are somethings that work for me.

1. When you see a bargain and you start to get hot and feverish (ladies you know what I'm talking about) and you have a shopping bag full of stuff, DO NOT check out at this point. You want to have a clear head when you go to pay. What I do is walk around the store with the stuff in my hand (this way you'll still feel secure) and then asking yourself a series of questions, 1) do I need this? 2) am I going to get use out of this purchase and how much use? 3) do I have something just like it (go over inventory of things you have). Eventually I start to put stuff back. Often times I walk out with nothing.

2. Make an excel spreadsheet/list of all the things you have. Better organization and visual presentation of your possessions makes a big difference. This is how I stopped buying so much MU. I think I have enough for the rest of my life (well, before they go bad). 

3. My rule is pay off all credit card do not carry a balance. 

4. Budget. A girl still needs to spoil herself, so give yourself a budget for splurges but keep track of it. Don't go over the set amount. 

5. Find cheaper ways to perk up a blue mood aside from shopping 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





 ie. a movie, rollerblading, working out, reading etc.


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