# I don't understand why this was so painful for me...



## ashley8119 (Nov 14, 2008)

I had my first pelvic exam/pap smear yesterday, and I can honestly say that it was the most painful thing I have experienced. I have endured some painful things in my life, so I'm no wuss when it comes to pain... Doctors and even hospital workers have even commented on my extreme high pain tolerance, so that's when you know this had to hurt...

I have done extensive research on these, and they say that these exams feel pressure/uncomfortable, but there should be no pain involved...and it was the worst pain for me. My body was in such shock from the pain that I couldn't cry until after it was over. Then when I started to sit up from laying down, I felt light-headed and I started to lean towards the side and the doctor and her assistant had to hold me up because they said I looked like I was going to pass out. 

I don't understand why it was so painful. Sure, I'm a virgin and stuff...and I was expecting maybe a little bit of discomfort and a 'stretch' sensation...but that was downright horrific pain.

It felt like a 2x4 wrapped in barbed wire and set on fire was inserted into my vagina, it was the worst pain I've ever experienced. It like, traumatized me. 

I've been told that people with endometriosis (it runs in my family, half of my aunts on my dad's side have it and I have some of the symptoms) have very painful pelvic exams and intercourse. I wouldn't know about the intercourse, cuz I'm a virgin, but I don't understand why it hurt so bad.

Has anybody else ever had a ridiculously painful pelvic exam? Is this normal?


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## TISH1124 (Nov 14, 2008)

My first exam was when I was 16 and a virgin and I cried for 24 hours ....I swear he had King Kong sized hands and the pain was the worst! I figured at that point I would never have sex because I thought it had to be horribly worse...That really pleased my parents!


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## ClaireAvril (Nov 14, 2008)

the whole situation is pretty uncomfortable.  What did your doc say after you told them it really hurt?


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## ashley8119 (Nov 14, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *ClaireAvril* 

 
_the whole situation is pretty uncomfortable.  What did your doc say after you told them it really hurt?_

 
I was telling her it hurt the whole time, and she kept going. All I could say was "I can't do this...I can't do this..." and a few curse words. She didn't stop or anything, she just kept going. I've been told that it's uncomfortable and that you can feel a slight pressure sensation...but this was the worst pain ever. I was surprised that she didn't stop, I couldnt' even form the word "stop", all I could do was swear, whimper and repeat "I can't do this.." She kept telling me it would be over soon. I was surprised that she didn't stop. Now I'm scared to get another one in the future, or even have sex.


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## snowflakelashes (Nov 14, 2008)

I think that kind of pain is not normal, that happened with mine, and it turned out to be an infection.  I like you was not sexually active so I had no clue that it would hurt that much, and I didn't know it wasn't normal to hurt that much, the Nurse saw tears in my eyes and was like "It shouldn't hurt, just be pressure"  I told her "Well it freaking HURTS". It ended up being a bacterial infection , Antibiotics cleared it up but still... I was scared it would always be like that but its not suppose to be....


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## noelsmom (Nov 14, 2008)

I do not think that that is normal, and I also feel as though the doctor should have took into consideration your pain level and at least give you the option to continue or not.  I have had uncomfortable paps and my first one was not the worst that I have had.  So it definitely depends on the doctor and their "technique."


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## cupcake_x (Nov 15, 2008)

Discomfort is normal- that extreme amount of pain isn't. Although I'm sure being a virgin makes it more difficult. If you were nervous and tense, that plays a huge role in it as well.

It sounds like you have endometriosis or vaginimus.

Go to your gyno (or a different one) and explain the intense pains you've been having. The new recommendation for seeing a gyno is 3 years after you've been sexually active, or after you're 18.. Besides getting checked out for endometriosis and vaginimus, I'd hold off on seeing a gyno especially if you can help it. Younger girls cervix and vaginal walls aren't done developing completely, therefore it may hurt more.

But basically- See a doctor, because that's not normal!


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## TISH1124 (Nov 15, 2008)

I can remember mine like it was yesterday.... I was tense and nervous and that didn't help because my muscles were all tight...But it was the worst ever! He kept saying that he was sorry, please try to relax and it will be over soon and that I was extremely small ...Sad thing is before I had my son and still to this day after ( ssince it was via c-section) every OB GYN has told me the same thing..but they have accoomodated me and been very gentle....and since I am no longer a virgin it is just uncomfortable not painful


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## cupcake_x (Nov 15, 2008)

Oh man, He? I'd die having a male gyno, how do you do it?! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





Also, when I went to Planned Parenthood awhile back the gyno there gave me a tip: It hurts less if you kind of scoot yourself towards them and kind of.. Scoot yourself onto the little speculum.

It hurt SO much less that way! That was my most joyous gyno experience :lol


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## TISH1124 (Nov 15, 2008)

^^ Cupcake_x
Yeah it's better if your a$$ is almost falling off the table...and then they still want you to come down more !!! I have always been more comfortable with Male GYN's ...I have been to females b4 but just prefer male. My OB/GYN that I had before I moved here 3 years ago was the best I ever had...I cried just thinking of leaving him ...he is so gentle, patient and has the best bed  side manner of any doctor I have ever seen. He always makes you feel wonderful no matter how crappy a day you are having. He was also a board certified plastic surgeon and he prided himself on giving the best C-Section incisions in the world...And he did...I can't even see where the scar was..I have to really concentrate to find it...
The Dr I have now is pretty good but not by any means a 
Dr. Isabelle....Loved him!!


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## cupcake_x (Nov 15, 2008)

Yeah I hate that.. "Why don't you scooch up just a liiiiitle more?"

But wow! That's great you found such a good gyno- I'm still searching.


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## chocolategoddes (Nov 15, 2008)

just reading this is making my stomach cringe. D,:
I'm refusing to see a gyno before I have sex and at least loosen up the puss a little. *sorry. that was graphic lol*

seriously i've never even put a tampon in there, let alone a giant hand.


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## banjobama (Nov 15, 2008)

I had a pelvic exam before I was sexually active because my periods were wonky, but it didn't hurt because she didn't use a speculum. However, I went to visit my dad for a couple weeks once, when I was still a virgin, and I got my period. I was way too embarrassed to ask him to buy me some pads and all there was in the house were some huge tampons of my stepmoms so I had to use those the entire time. I was in sooo much pain, I could hardly walk. It felt like ripping a scab off the inside of my vagina every time I had to put one in or take one out. 

I'm guessing your hymen broke or tore, and that's what hurt, unless you have been having other pains. Some girls just have a thicker one and it hurts like hell no matter what.

Pelvic exams never stop sucking BTW. My old nurse at Planned Parenthood used to talk to my cervix and tell it to come out so she could see it.


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## xxManBeaterxx (Nov 15, 2008)

Maybe you were nervous?  If you were, all your muscles were probably squeezing really tightly down there, making any sort of penetration painful, especially the obgyn "tools."  Next time try to relax, take deep breathes, relax your muscles, and think about something else.  

You may have a high pain tolerance but when it comes to your lady bits and another guy digging in there for the first time, you feel a lot more anxiety than if u were to get pinched on the leg.  Maybe your doctor wasnt gentle...  Also if you are concerned about endometriosis you should talk to your doctor.

I was a virgin the first time i went to get a pap smear and checkup, i remember it being a little painful, but as soon as it was over i felt normal.


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## NicksWifey (Nov 15, 2008)

I had my first pap smear before I was sexually active as well. I was 18 at the time and petrified. My OB/GYN told me that he would stop if I felt uncomfortable or in too much pain. It did hurt but luckily it was over with in a flash. I agree that when you are really nervous about something (especially of this nature), you tend to have a really hard time relaxing your muscles and that always makes it hurt worse.

I'm really sorry you had to go through that though. I always thank God that it's a once a year exam!


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## Chikky (Nov 15, 2008)

I don't think it's endometriosis. I have _severe_ endometriosis, and my first exam (young and a virgin) was merely uncomfortable, mostly because I didn't know what to expect, but nothing horrible. Endometriosis is not at your opening; it's more inward in your body. Like, back by your ovaries and womb and up from there (Mine even moved my stomach out of place, I have so much.) Granted, everyone's different, but I've never heard of it being down there. 

I would probably ask another doctor.  


 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *TISH1127* 

 
_ I have always been more comfortable with Male GYN's ..._

 
I'm with you. I've never been with a female OBGYN, but I don't even want to try it. It makes me nervous. MUCH rather be with a male!


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## ratmist (Nov 15, 2008)

Were you really nervous?  If so, you could've been tightening all your pelvic floor muscles and your vagina.  In my experience, that makes one of these exams hugely painful.  

That said, I've had a lot of these exams due to various problems and they've always been painful to a degree for me.  The worst times were the first time I when I was still a virgin, and a few times while I was pregnant.   

I think the difference is in whether you're able to relax completely, or if you're tensed up.  It's very hard to relax though when you aren't really comfortable with someone having his or her hands in your most sensitive regions.

It sounds like it fairly traumatised you.  I wouldn't go back to that doctor again if I had the choice.  I'd either switch, or I'd be very sure that the doctor understands that s/he has to stop if you say to stop or that you can't continue with the exam.  It really disturbs me that the doctor didn't stop.


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## ClaireAvril (Nov 15, 2008)

i think there's an age that they recommend you get a pap smear even though you may be a virgin.  There are still infections and cancers that you wanna make sure that you don't have.  

Were you really tense when you were having the smear?  I know being tense can make it hurt.
Anyway if you were really that affected by it i suggest you get a second opinion.
Some doctors probably think a lot of girls get so scared that they blow it out of proportion.  But you know your own body.

My friends says her doctor somehow warms up the tool before using it.. how sweet.


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## abbyquack (Nov 29, 2008)

I have a friend who has a really small cervix and her pain is just like you described . Interestingly she doesn't have problems with sex but with her exams its a nightmare. Maybe that is what it is. I would definitely address this with a doctor because this is your health we are talking about. Plus you wouldn't be worried anymore if you knew the answer. Good luck!


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## mizuki~ (Nov 29, 2008)

I can't believe your doctor didn't notice that you were in so much pain..I'm sorry you had such a terrible experience

My first exam is coming up in 2 days...hope all goes well


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## PuterChick (Nov 30, 2008)

Mine wasn't painful, just a tad uncomfortable.  My Dr. was very gentle!

Wait till you have to have a mammogram!  I had my first this year (five years late), and they have to smash your boob between two plates!!!  They found something so I had to go back for more mammograms and then they did a sonogram and found a cyst.  I just need to keep an eye on it and make sure to go back yearly........


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## jojotheclown (Apr 7, 2013)

I had the same experience as you with a woman too. I had an ovarian cyst. I told her 2 times that I was a virgin and the minute she started, I told her to stop. She didn't and instead she kept going. I screamed and yelled and begged her to stop and when she was done, she walked out of the room. I sat up and blood came pouring out of my vagina because the bitch tore my hymen.


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## fabulousmoolah (Sep 6, 2013)

I'm 38 so have had years worth of pap smears (and have given birth). It's extremely uncomfortable and unpleasant every time, and this is with several different doctors. It's not so much painful but I dread it and it is never a good experience. The only thing that makes it better is when they get it over with quickly.


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## mac1234 (Sep 15, 2013)

My exam was horrific!! As soon as he put his finger in I was crying, in so much pain I was 14. He kept pushing my legs back further and further I thought he was going to brake them! Instead of considering my pain and me crying he carried on with 4 fingers and putting them in more and more he told me to be naked so I was already very uncomtable it was a horrible experience I started shaking and it was pouring of blood I've never had one done since.


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## Ms Jelena (Oct 13, 2013)

After horror stories I've heard about female GPs, I ended up going to a male doctor and he was lovely. It didn't hurt, it was just extremely uncomfortable and like nothing I've been through before, so I did hate it and I wish I didn't have to do it, but tough luck


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## akascared (Oct 13, 2014)

I had my first exam today but it was so paid ful and traumatic. She couldn't even finish putting in the speculum and I was painfully exclaiming ouch ouch stop!stop!She tried another speculum. I think the smallest one she had. I tried to relax and do what I needed to do but it was still too painful. So she just examined me with her fingers. She said it seemed normal in there. I came home and had some blood.I have an ultrasound scheduled for next week non invasive.I will not let them do this again! This was worse than being catheterized at the urologist. She tried until it didn't hurt anymore.At some point she got it in without hardly any pain.


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## Dominique33 (Oct 13, 2014)

It is sometimes painful but a doctor does not care about pains, they are seen as minor ones in fact, he or she has to check out several things in the same time if cannot relax for some reason then It is a painful exam. A smear can be painful but there is a reason for It . The gyne must get cells from various locations in the cervix and if she skips one of these locations then the cervical smear is not valid. Clearly It means you can Have a serious issue and know nothing about It. I hate such exams and all invasive ones I wish they had non invasive méthods to check out our whole body from head to toe.


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## akascared (Oct 13, 2014)

The catch 22 is if you hurt while getting examined you will tense up and that makes it harder on the doctor. I apologized that I could not help the doctor do her job.


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## akascared (Oct 15, 2014)

I am still spotting some where they hurt me on Monday. I knew something was wrong. I think its supposed to be normal but I may call my GPs nurse. She is super nice.


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## alvaradojay20 (Sep 28, 2015)

i just had my very first exam like a week ago and i had the same experience as you. it was extremely painful that the doctor couldnt finish the exam. crazy part is that im not a virgin. i had sex once but it was years ago (the WORST experience of my life). But just with the tip of the docs fingers was unbareable. AND on top of that, now im experience a bit dryness and a lot of sensitivity down there. Even to wash myself hurts.


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## myeka (Feb 16, 2016)

I've had more than one and they all hurt. You're not alone!


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## Sunflowergal2 (Sep 16, 2017)

Hello,
i also was an virgin and 20 years old. I went to my moms gynecologist whom was nice. However I was stuck with a different doctor when it came down to when I had to get the Pap smear. First off, my gynecologist had no sympathy for my virgin self and said to me in a nasty tone oh sorry but this will hurt. she inserted the speculum and it hurt very much. My vagina was tense. Also I have an very small vagina and it is really tight. It felt as if she inserted an pregnant women's speculum in me. Then there was this big brush and it looked so big that it could have been used for an elephant. Luckily she stopped because I was crying. Like it hurt so bad. I am still a virgin but probably will go after I have intercourse which is soon. Honestly I am so happy that I only have to worry about it every 3 years.


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## Mirelanavaro (Sep 27, 2017)

It is not normal. A little annoyance is felt when the fluid is wet for the examination. He would have to stop for me the exam.


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