# Scary Clown eBay Auction



## metal_romantic (May 17, 2009)

This truly made my day. This is brilliant.
A man got laid off and decided to find a creative way to feed his family. He auctioned off his scary clown services- following someone around for 3 days scaring them, basically. The winning bid (of 42!) was $355.







Unfortunately, since I posted this, the eBay link expired. You can see some of it here:
ebay EXPERIENCE YOUR FEAR OF CLOWNS

The Q&A's aren't complete but it's better than nothing.

Here's my personal favourite:
Q:  i need this as a gift to my brother who is the  king of Africa. Will you ship, along with your  social security number, date of birth, and  mothers maiden name to consulate.  they will  pay  you for all your troubles 1.5 millon GBP for  deposit into your account.  after i receive item  i will gladly leave positive feedback and you do  the same.  fuck yea, it's marbles. Feb-09-09
A: I'm not sure this arrangement will work for me.









_Item Specifics_



Weirdness : *Clown fear*









_ Afraid of Clowns? Ever see a movie with a creepy clown and get scared to death? Believe it or not, there are people out there who like to be scared. This idea came to me when a friend mentioned they love scary movies and the thrill it gives them. This auction is for a 3 day thrill ride through your greatest fear! ~CLOWNS~!!!! I will dress up as a clown and scare you for 3 days STRAIGHT, everywhere you go, I will follow, dressed as a clown. When you least expect it - BOOM!!! There I'll be to creeper you out! This is something you will only want to experience once. LIVE your SCARIEST MOVIE SCENES! Included in this auction, is my travel expenses to wherever you live to give you 3 days of creepy, clowny excitement! BID NOW AND EXPERIENCE this once in a lifetime Thrill.... Are you Brave Enough? *This is meant for entertainment purposes only, no harm will come to you from this, just scariest thrill of a lifetime! Live a haunted house come to life for 3 entire days. _


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## SparklingWaves (May 17, 2009)

delete


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## claralikesguts (May 17, 2009)

all i can say is... LOL.


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## Hilly (May 17, 2009)

haha id love to hear the ending of this clown casualty.


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## Makeup Emporium (May 17, 2009)

OMG, hilarious, clowns have always terrified me!!  Not quite sure why though??


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## mizzbeba (May 17, 2009)

That made my day! lol.


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## User27 (May 17, 2009)

The Q & A's were genius. This guy has the most hilarious auction ever. I'd pay for the videotaping of this just like a few others....minus the toys and thong scene cuz yeah, large guys in thongs don't do much for me. Thanks for posting this.....have to show it to 3 others now.  XD


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## X4biddenxLustX (May 17, 2009)

Clowns scare me so I didn't click on the click. But this guy was clever though!


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## metal_romantic (May 17, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Casadalinnis* 

 
_The Q & A's were genius. This guy has the most hilarious auction ever. I'd pay for the videotaping of this just like a few others....minus the toys and thong scene cuz yeah, large guys in thongs don't do much for me. Thanks for posting this.....have to show it to 3 others now.  XD_

 
Yes... as long as he also leaves out the "fake" rapes... and the adult diaper... and the dry humping... and the strap-on...


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## xkleverxkittyx (May 17, 2009)

omgoodness, they freak me out too. I think it was from seeing "attack of the killer clowns" as a child


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## metal_romantic (May 17, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Makeup Emporium* 

 
_OMG, hilarious, clowns have always terrified me!!  Not quite sure why though??
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 
Perhaps you saw Stephen King's "It"...


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## X4biddenxLustX (May 18, 2009)

I haven't ever seen the movie "It" or any crazy scary clown movies. But they just freak me out so bad. Like the ones that kids laugh at and the funny ones I'm not afraid of. But if someone came in with a killer clown mask costume on, I better prefer for a heart attack lol. 

I remember it was 2 halloween's ago my friend and this guy visited a haunted house and there was a clown house. I totally freaked out and started to panic and ran the hell out of there! They were hanging from the ceiling ALL OVER the house.


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## metal_romantic (May 18, 2009)

I think the guy should've been paid more. It's 3 whole days of work - travel expenses and hotel rooms. Plus, it's a unique service.


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## Dreamergirl3 (May 18, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_Clowns scare me so I didn't click on the click. But this guy was clever though!_

 
HAHAHAHA! I just went through the same thing! I read 'clowns', saw the link, and was like "effff naw!" Good to know I was not the only one!


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## Tahti (May 18, 2009)

D: HATE clowns..


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## X4biddenxLustX (May 18, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Dreamergirl3* 

 
_HAHAHAHA! I just went through the same thing! I read 'clowns', saw the link, and was like "effff naw!" Good to know I was not the only one!_

 
Off topic- but I'd like to apologize for all of my stupid typos! I just sort of type and don't really give much thought when it's all typed up on the screen. I'm embarassed now lol.

I wasn't even sure if I was going to even view this thread in the first place just cause of the simple word "clowns" in the title lol!


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## X4biddenxLustX (May 18, 2009)

Omg, so how about for some reason the first several times I was on this thread the pic of the clown didn't show up at all for some reason. Now that I scroll up I suddenly see it and am scared. Wow, I'm such a wuss hahaha. But he's creepy as hell!!!


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## metal_romantic (May 19, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *X4biddenxLustX* 

 
_Omg, so how about for some reason the first several times I was on this thread the pic of the clown didn't show up at all for some reason. Now that I scroll up I suddenly see it and am scared. Wow, I'm such a wuss hahaha. But he's creepy as hell!!!_

 
...the other pic had blood 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




At least now, if you are ever afraid of an evil clown, you can tell yourself that's it's just the ebay guy, who is harmless. Having said that, if you ever DO see an evil clown, you'd be best to RUN, just in case...


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## staceb1990 (May 19, 2009)

That brought back memories of "Killer Clowns from Outerspace", the scariest movie I've ever seen


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## metal_romantic (May 19, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *staceb1990* 

 
_That brought back memories of "Killer Clowns from Outerspace", the scariest movie I've ever seen 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 
Ooh! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 That sounds delicious.

The link expired. I'm ever so sad. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




If anyone was wondering about the Q&A's, most of them were asking if he could film it, if he would scare their friend (he would need consent), if he would pretend to murder them in a public place, if he would pretend to rape them (with or without a strap on as a prop for this theatrical exercise) and/or their friends, including homophobic clown-hating friends, if he was a fat or a thin clown, if he had multiple costumes so they could feel like a few different evil clowns were after them, if he could be a non-scary clown for a kids' fundraiser, if he could fly to Australia (no, that wasn't my question), would he mind if they dressed in an adult diaper, if he would wear a thong, could they have his social security number to make a western union transfer for their brother in Nigeria, ya know, those kind of things. Lol.

Fuck yea, it's marbles!


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## X4biddenxLustX (May 19, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *metal_romantic* 

 
_...the other pic had blood 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





At least now, if you are ever afraid of an evil clown, you can tell yourself that's it's just the ebay guy, who is harmless. Having said that, if you ever DO see an evil clown, you'd be best to RUN, just in case..._

 
When I visited this thread again, I IMMEDIATELY scrolled down to the bottom not only to just check the posts but to avoid the pic of him hahaha! I'm home alone right now even though it's a sunny day, I still get the creeps when I'm by myself a lot of the time. And that pic would not help at all lol. 

If I ever see an evil clown ever again in person, Mr. Ebay or not he's getting something thrown at him before I run off and scream my head off lmfao. I guess no more scare/haunted houses next halloween for this missy


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## User27 (May 19, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *metal_romantic* 

 
_Ooh! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 That sounds delicious.

The link expired. I'm ever so sad. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




If anyone was wondering about the Q&A's, most of them were asking if he could film it, if he would scare their friend (he would need consent), if he would pretend to murder them in a public place, if he would pretend to rape them (with or without a strap on as a prop for this theatrical exercise) and/or their friends, including homophobic clown-hating friends, if he was a fat or a thin clown, if he had multiple costumes so they could feel like a few different evil clowns were after them, if he could be a non-scary clown for a kids' fundraiser, if he could fly to Australia (no, that wasn't my question), would he mind if they dressed in an adult diaper, if he would wear a thong, could they have his social security number to make a western union transfer for their brother in Nigeria, ya know, those kind of things. Lol.

Fuck yea, it's marbles! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	







_

 

I went to show my friend when he was over last night and the link was dead. Thank you for writing out some of the Q & A's because he thought I was lying about the auction and said I was Punking him. The Q & A's were interchangable too. I would have left one like : Will you wear a strap on while mock raping me, video taping it all the while, while my loser brother from Nigeria watches from the corner? Now that I typed that, it's way worse than it would have looked on an auction thread.


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## LMD84 (May 19, 2009)

i saw this and it made me laugh alot! esp the questions asked! hee hee! i know what it's like to enjoy being scared. me and hubby love going to universal studios in october when they have there halloween horror nights. you go around themed haunted houses and people jump out at you and stuff. scares the heck out of me! one year i even ran out of the nightmare on elm street house crying!! but i love it! makes me sweat and scared to much but it's all good fun!

plus the fact he's doing it for his family makes this guy a winner in my book! creative and loyal


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## metal_romantic (May 19, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Casadalinnis* 

 
_I went to show my friend when he was over last night and the link was dead. Thank you for writing out some of the Q & A's because he thought I was lying about the auction and said I was Punking him. The Q & A's were interchangable too. I would have left one like : Will you wear a strap on while mock raping me, video taping it all the while, while my loser brother from Nigeria watches from the corner? Now that I typed that, it's way worse than it would have looked on an auction thread. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 
I wish I could remember them all. His responses were funny too. When asked if he could wear a strap on and dry hump his homophobic clown-hating friend provided he get a waiver signed, Mr. Ebay Clown's response was: "Sure!"

Your Q made me laugh 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I <3 it!

Q: "Will you fly to Canada, get drunk, wear a thong and a strap on dildo and "fake" rape my homophobic clown-hating brother from Nigeria in the town square, pretend to murder me while I wear an adult diaper, and then send a DVD of it along with your name, DOB, social security no. and mother's maiden name to my other brother, the King of all Africa? He will pay you 1.5m GBP for your trouble."
A: "Sure!"


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## metal_romantic (May 19, 2009)

*Good News Everyone!*
_(said in a Dr. Farnsworth voice, for those who watch Futurama)_

Some kind person has saved the bloody pic from the auction and some of the Q&A's (not complete, was done before the auction ended, but better than nothing.)
ebay EXPERIENCE YOUR FEAR OF CLOWNS

I've put it at the top of the page 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	





On a related topic: best of craigslist : Seeking Adult Drunk Clown for 30th Birthday party


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## User27 (May 19, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *metal_romantic* 

 
_I wish I could remember them all. His responses were funny too. When asked if he could wear a strap on and dry hump his homophobic clown-hating friend provided he get a waiver signed, Mr. Ebay Clown's response was: "Sure!"

Your Q made me laugh 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I <3 it!

Q: "Will you fly to Canada, get drunk, wear a thong and a strap on dildo and "fake" rape my homophobic clown-hating brother from Nigeria in the town square, pretend to murder me while I wear an adult diaper, and then send a DVD of it along with your name, DOB, social security no. and mother's maiden name to my other brother, the King of all Africa? He will pay you 1.5m GBP for your trouble."
A: "Sure!"_

 
Effing epic and boyfriend was like I thought you all talked about makeup on there. Told him they also sell sex toys here and showed him the swap and buy thread. He believed it until he saw all the MAC, Nars and Urban Decay in the titles. He said we're all a bunch of warped people for wanting a clown to rape us....his missed the point of this somewhere after realizing we weren't swapping dildos. Got me wondering about him now. 

That question takes the cake of any put on here so far.....we're even trapping it in a quote.


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## User27 (May 19, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *LMD84* 

 
_one year i even ran out of the nightmare on elm street house crying!! but i love it!_

 
True story that will make me the wussiest bitch on all of Specktra. There was a movie in that series called Dream Warriors...the third part of the movies Robert Englund did. We had just moved to Maryland and I was trying to be cool to my "mature" 14 year old friends at the age of 9 and watched this movie. My bedroom was down in the club style basement with one mild drawback....the laundry room off to the back with a heating furnace that made this whoosh noise throughout the night. 

End of story, my mother had to take over that room with my stepfather because I had nightmares that made me wake up crying and screaming from the furnace. Luckily, I wasn't a bedwetter. Unluckily, my brother will still randomly bring it up in front of friends that my mom and I had to swap rooms over me being scared of Freddy Krueger. Wow, that's my most embarrassing confession on here so far but eh, you learn.


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## User27 (May 19, 2009)

On a related topic: best of craigslist : Seeking Adult Drunk Clown for 30th Birthday party[/quote]

John Wayne Gacy was one hell of a social drinker. Don't know if I'd pay him him for services rendered....might cost me my life. Eeeekk....bad taste.


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## metal_romantic (May 19, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Casadalinnis* 

 
_On a related topic: best of craigslist : Seeking Adult Drunk Clown for 30th Birthday party_

 
John Wayne Gacy was one hell of a social drinker. Don't know if I'd pay him him for services rendered....might cost me my life. Eeeekk....bad taste.[/quote]

It would be funny to see a non-murdering, harmless drunk clown tagging along on a pub crawl (or perhaps that's an Australian term... "bar-hopping") for someone's birthday. Free drinks and payment by the hour- a good gig if you can get it. I think there's something to this clown business. Scaring people, drinking... I can think of a few people just off the top of my head who already do this and don't get paid.


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## User27 (May 20, 2009)

It would be funny to see a non-murdering, harmless drunk clown tagging along on a pub crawl (or perhaps that's an Australian term... "bar-hopping") for someone's birthday. Free drinks and payment by the hour- a good gig if you can get it. I think there's something to this clown business. Scaring people, drinking... I can think of a few people just off the top of my head who already do this and don't get paid.[/quote]

We have them in Maryland at Fells Point. We call them homeless men but they're a trip here. We went out there for our one year mark and this drunk, homeless guy followed us around Fells and tried getting me and this lesbian to hook up. A lesbian that I had no idea who she was at the time. Now we're hella cool because of the homeless guy but my bf hated that celebration. He bought more roses once he saw me and the girl Marion getting along but now he jokes it off that I'm a gay magnet.


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## chiquilla_loca (May 20, 2009)

wow, that's interesting & scary! i can envision how this scary clown service could go wrong, cuz it seems some people are wanting to win the auction for the purpose of scaring someone else. if all of a sudden a scary ass clown came and jumped from behind, i might have a heart attack & die, or have something in my hand and use it to defend myself, or something worse...use your imagination!
other people wanted to win the auction for freaky sexual fantasies 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



(See the Q&A)


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## IDontKnowMomo (May 20, 2009)

This is so goofy and hilarious


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## metal_romantic (May 20, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *chiquilla_loca* 

 
_wow, that's interesting & scary! i can envision how this scary clown service could go wrong, cuz it seems some people are wanting to win the auction for the purpose of scaring someone else. if all of a sudden a scary ass clown came and jumped from behind, i might have a heart attack & die, or have something in my hand and use it to defend myself, or something worse...use your imagination!
other people wanted to win the auction for freaky sexual fantasies 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



(See the Q&A)_

 
I think he ended up saying that if the winner wanted him to scare anyone else, that they would have to know about it and give permission first. Still, you'd have to be on edge for 3 days, because once you let your guard down for a second..... BOOM! EVIL CLOWN!!


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## chiquilla_loca (May 21, 2009)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *metal_romantic* 

 
_I think he ended up saying that if the winner wanted him to scare anyone else, that they would have to know about it and give permission first. Still, you'd have to be on edge for 3 days, because once you let your guard down for a second..... BOOM! EVIL CLOWN!!_

 
so knowing that the clown is there, but not not knowing when he'll scare you...ohhh the suspense!


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## beautifulxface (May 22, 2009)

*sigh* I love Ebay.


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