# This sucks a$$



## rbella (Nov 25, 2008)

.....


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## Lizzie (Nov 25, 2008)

Oh rbella!  I just want to give you a big hug!  I know you're upset, but it's kind of a funny situation...the type sitcoms are built upon.  I would totally watch the rbella show!  And yes, your makeup will make their faces want to hide in shame.  

We just need to find you a kickass recipe to make them shut their piehole.


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## gigglegirl (Nov 25, 2008)

Sorry to hear about that Rbella! Awww I would try your cooking/baking first at any rate! If you take time to watch measurements etc does it work? We should chat and Ill try and give you some funky easy recipes! 

Okay on with the rest of my response: 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			




Would you like a relatively easy recipe? I was reading your comments and thought of this recipe, I don't know if it can be really messed up (but forgive me if you were just wanted to vent, lol now here I am suggesting things) It is a pistachio pudding/cool whip/with a cookie type base.

Now I have to be heading off to work, but if you are interested, I will find the recipe tonight. I love it! Or otherwise, go and get some funky cupcakes (bought) but I recently tried these ones at Safeway (I'm sure there is something similar) that had regular white or choc cake, then funky icing ie mint, strawberry, banana etc) and they were a HUGE hit for a co-workers b-day when I brought them. My thing was, I didn't want to be the one to make something, bring it and have something retarded like a hair strand. Yuck, but sometimes it happens. 

Ramble off. On to work now!


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## Lauren1981 (Nov 25, 2008)

this is some funny shit.
sorry if it's not meant to be funny 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




you could always just go get some velveeta shells and cheese and put it in a ceramic bowl and add a little more cheese on top to make it appear as if you made it. or just get some cookie mix so all you have to do is add an egg and butter.

or...........

if you want to stop this trend from here on out, make something super nasty so that they don't ask you to make anything anymore. i made some cookies years ago with this crisco butter...... and not the yellow kind, the white kind and they tasted like straight lard. they were so freakin nasty but it kind of made my fam stop eating anything i made for a while.

whatever you decide i hope everything works out for ya!


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## Hilly (Nov 25, 2008)

Here is an EASY recipe which is so delish and healthy!

PUMPKIN MUFFINS:
These are Weight Watchers muffins, and three points each.

Ingredients:

Box spice cake mix
15 ounce can pumpkin
1/2 cup applesauce (or individual serving-size container)
bag of Hershey's Cinnamon chips

Mix all ingredients together, spoon into greased muffin tins (paper liners do not work well with these muffins). Bake at 350 for 20 minutes. Yield: 18 muffins. 


hth


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## rbella (Nov 25, 2008)

Thanks, you guys are the best.  I am really freaking out.  I have to go to the store today.  I usually only go to buy toilet paper and paper towels so I have no clue what to do.  For instance, I have no clue where to buy Box Spice Cake Mix.  WTF is that?


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## Hilly (Nov 25, 2008)

LOL...girl we need to get together!!!!

Box Spice cake mix is in the baking aisle with all the cake mixes  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I only started baking because I got a red kitchen aid mixer for my wedding and it is da bomb to play with. So lately , I am betsey baker! Hahaha


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## Willa (Nov 25, 2008)

I'm pretending they know about you not being a good cook here :

Bring an homemade pie you bought at the bakery, and just tell them : yeah I bought it at the store, you know I don't cook well... 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I'd be soooooo anoyed about the fact that they still make the boring jokes (be carefull she'll poison you!) 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Direct as I am, I'd tell them to stop making such bad jokes...


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## User93 (Nov 25, 2008)

Oh sweety, here you are *chases with a hug*
I pretty suck at cooking.. I burned a few pies. I suggest just ordering in a bakery a cake, so it looks home-made, saying you made it, getting to his relatives with this baked goodie and pwning them and their "beware" comments!


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## florabundance (Nov 25, 2008)

LMAO. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Here's a recipe that's super easy and everyone always likes chocolate shiz, so they can all eat it and shut up and be thankful (is that not the point afterall? 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




).
Chocolate brownie cake recipe - Recipes - BBC Good Food

Let us know how your dessert making ventures go, and of course if the fam approve.


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## Shimmer (Nov 25, 2008)

Ingredients:

    * 1 package (18.25 ounces) German chocolate cake mix
    * 3/4 cup (1 1/2 sticks) butter or margarine, melted
    * 7 tablespoons NESTLÉ® CARNATION® Evaporated Milk, divided
    * 1 cup chopped pecans
    * 1 cup (6 ounces) NESTLÉ® TOLL HOUSE® Semi-Sweet Chocolate Morsels
    * 20 NESTLÉ SIGNATURES TURTLES Candies

Directions:
PREHEAT oven to 375° F. Grease 13 x 9-inch baking pan.

COMBINE cake mix, butter and 5 tablespoons evaporated milk in large bowl; stir until blended. Stir in nuts. Spread half of cake mix mixture onto bottom of prepared pan.

BAKE for 12 minutes. Cool in pan on wire rack for 10 minutes.

MICROWAVE morsels and remaining evaporated milk in small, uncovered, microwave-safe bowl on HIGH (100%) power for 1 minute; STIR. Morsels may retain some of their original shape. If necessary, microwave at additional 10- to 15-second intervals, stirring until smooth. Gently spread over cake layer. Place candy on cake layer; drop remaining cake mix mixture by heaping teaspoon between candy.

BAKE for 16 to 18 minutes. Cool completely in pan on wire rack. Cut into squares.


Thank me later.
When I'm far away when you realize how luscious these things are. My aunt makes them for me and I guard them with a knife until I've put myself into a mild sugar coma.


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## Shimmer (Nov 25, 2008)

And, that's NOT a WW safe recipe. 
It's not safe for any diet except the I SWEAR I'LL WORK IT OFF TOMORROW diet.


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## AngelBunny (Nov 25, 2008)

I can't cook either, so if I were you I would be stressed as hell!  

However, I do make these pies every year that require NO COOKING AT ALL, are low sugar so my diabetic father can eat them (the reason I started making them in the first place) and the recipe is actually straight from Weight Watchers so no one can complain.  

All you do is take on package of Sugar Free Jello of any flavor, two 6 oz containers of yogurt to match (or mix if you like) the jello you chose, a tub of Cool Whip lite and two premade graham cracker crusts.  

You just mix the jello with a few tablespoons of HOT water to dissolve it, then mix it in with the yogurt and cool whip.  Then you pour that mixture into the two crusts (enough to make two full pies) and put it into the refrigerator to set for a few hours.  Voila!  No cooking ... good for you ... and these are sooooo yummy!  

My favorite is Cherry Lime ... use cherry jello and Key Lime pie yogurt.  Ok ... now I am hungry.  Hope that helps!

And don't worry about not knowing where to find stuff ... just ask the people that work at the store, that is why they are there.


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## aleksis210 (Nov 25, 2008)

2 words, Betty Crocker....those cake-in-a-boxes you see at your grocery store are soooo good. And very very easy. Technically it's homemade too. Good luck! Shit and if people are making jokes flat-out tell them 'Don't eat it then..'


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## abbey_08 (Nov 25, 2008)

just make something really easy!! and practice making it loads before, so youl be an expert!!! 

or buy a chocolate fountain and lots of things to dip in it...not quite baking but everyone loves chocolate


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## User93 (Nov 25, 2008)

Also, here is an *exremely* easy recipe too.

*Ingridients:*
Apples (4-5)
250 grams of sugar
250 grams of flour OF COURSE
3 eggs
Some cinnamon

(thats it!)

You just take the pan where you gonna bake it first and put some waxed paper inside, then put some butter so its easier to remove the further cake.

Then, cut apples into slices, so they are accurate, and put it in circles all over the bottom of the pan. Theu gotta look nice though down there.

After, you mix 250 grams of sugar, 250 grams of flour, and 3 eggs, and make dough from it. After its done, put this dough all over those apples. Done!

Then you bake at 180 degrees, but when you put in the oven it gotta be hot already. Bake about 20-30 mins.

And thats it! After you remove the cake you turn it upside down, so the apples are up (thats why we needed them to look nice). Put some sugar on it, and  cinnamon. You're done!


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## florabundance (Nov 25, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Alibi* 

 
_ 
After, you mix 250 grams of sugar and 3 eggs, and make dough from it._

 
Dough from sugar and eggs only??????? REALLY?


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## concertina (Nov 25, 2008)

These are called Pumpkin Spice-Chip Cookies. It looks intimidating, but these are seriously some of the easiest cookies I've ever made. And I never do the glaze; they are already sweet enough!

2 1/2 Cups All-Purpose Flour 
1 Teaspoon Baking Powder 
1 Teaspoon Baking Soda 
1 Teaspoon Ground Cinnamon 
1/2 Teaspoon Ground Nutmeg 
1/2 Teaspoon Salt 
1 1/2 Cups Granulated Sugar (this is just regular white sugar)
1/2 Cup Butter (Softened) (just put it in the microwave for about 15 seconds; if your microwave runs really 'strong', only 10 seconds. You want the butter soft, not liquid)
1 Cup Pumpkin (Canned or Fresh) (this is *NOT* canned pumpkin pie filling; just regular canned pumpkin. It will be right next to the canned PP filling in the baking aisle) 
1 Large Egg 
1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract (*not* imitation vanilla; they will also be side by side on the spice aisle) 
1/2 Cup Chocolate Chips 
Glaze (recipe follows)

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Combine dry ingredients: flour, baking soda, baking powder, cinnamon, nutmeg, and salt in medium bowl. Mix sugar and butter in a different large mixing bowl until well blended. Beat the pumpkin, egg, and vanilla extract into the sugar/butter bowl until smooth. Gradually beat in/add the dry ingredients to the pumpkin/sugar/butter bowl until smooth. Fold in (or lightly mix) the chocolate chips. Batter will have a thick consistency. Drop by over-filled round tablespoons (use a regular spoon) onto greased (use Pam spray or crisco) cookie sheet .
Bake for 15-18 minutes, or until edges are firm (this means the middle of the cookies will still be jiggly or puffed a bit). Cool for a couple minutes (on the cookie sheet, after you take it out of the oven), and transfer to wire rack to cool completely before storing.

Glaze: Combine two cups powdered sugar, 3 tablespoons milk, 1 tablespoon melted (now you want liquid) butter, and one teaspoon vanilla extract. Mix until smooth, and drizzle glaze over cookies. Enjoy!




I hope my extra instructions help!


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## melozburngr (Nov 25, 2008)

Dude Pumpkin pie is like the easiest thing ever you mix the shit together - and dump it into a premade pie crust- totally totally easy.   use Libby's recipe:

1 (9 inch) unbaked deep dish pie crust  (I use the premade kind that is by the tubes of cinnamon rolls --  usually Pillsbury I think? I dunno- maroon box- has two crusts inside, all you have to do is unroll them and put them in a pie pan and c'est voila!)
3/4 cup white sugar
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
2 eggs
1 (15 ounce) can LIBBY'S® 100% Pure Pumpkin
1 (12 fluid ounce) can NESTLE® CARNATION® Evaporated Milk


instead of the individual spices (ginger, cinnamon, cloves)  you can use 2 1/2 teaspoons of pumpkin pie seasoning - McCormick makes it.

Preheat oven to 425 F.
Combine sugar, salt, cinnamon, ginger and cloves in small bowl. Beat eggs lightly in large bowl. Stir in pumpkin and sugar-spice mixture. Gradually stir in evaporated milk. Pour into pie shell.
Bake for 15 minutes. Reduce temperature to 350 F.; bake for 40 to 50 minutes or until knife inserted near center comes out clean. Cool on wire rack for 2 hours. Serve immediately or refrigerate. (Do not freeze as this will cause the crust to separate from the filling.)

To be honest, you really can't eff it up- short of letting it turn into charcoal- even my sister can make this- and she had to call me to find out how to make boiled eggs.
I always mix cinnamon into the cool whip too, it tastes sooooo good.


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## MzzRach (Nov 25, 2008)

Maybe I'm the odd one out here - but is there a reason you could not pick something up at a bakery or somesuch?  Or would that be totally pussing out?  I feel your pain - I have a cookie recipe that has become my holiday speciality, but in general I am a fair at best cook.

Why do holidays have to be things that can make a person crazed with guilt and fear and anxiety?  It's not right.  

*big hugs to you*


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## hawaii02 (Nov 25, 2008)

Hugs to you!! Banana cream pie is very easy. 

1 store-bought pie shell (either from the frozen section or a graham cracker crust)
banana pudding mix
3 or 4 bananas
Cool Whip

Heat oven for 375. "Toast" your pie shell for 10 minutes. Let shell cool. After it cools, slice your bananas and put them in the bottom of the shell. Follow pudding mix directions from box and add on top of bananas. Put whipped cream on top. 

Off the top of my head 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





HTH!!


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## User93 (Nov 25, 2008)

Florabundance, man, I was in such a hurry, also flour of course


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## elegant-one (Nov 25, 2008)

My side hurts from laughing! This is soooo funny rbella...because I can relate. I don't/can't cook either 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 nor do I care to. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




"I always supply the alcohol, why the change, beyotches?"

OMG...
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Just pick something yummy up at a great bakery & put it in _your_ dish, then you can get the credit. Or, make something really bad & then you can go back to bringing the alcohol again.

Or, you can just come to my house...& we'll just drink alcohol


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## rbella (Nov 25, 2008)

My God!!! You are all cooking geniuses!  Thank you very much.  I will try one of these fo sho.  Whichever one uses the least ingredients and doesn't involve a lot of stirring or anything like that.  Seriously, I'm that bad.  My husband won't even eat my toast and I'm not joking.

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *MzzRach* 

 
_Maybe I'm the odd one out here - but is there a reason you could not pick something up at a bakery or somesuch? Or would that be totally pussing out? I feel your pain - I have a cookie recipe that has become my holiday speciality, but in general I am a fair at best cook.

Why do holidays have to be things that can make a person crazed with guilt and fear and anxiety? It's not right. 

*big hugs to you*_

 
Totally be pussing out.  My poor husband was raised in a family of cooks and they always make fun of how much his life must suck being married to me.  Isn't that kind?  They are kidding, of course, they actually love me, but it still gets old.  I know he would be so happy if I could successfully prepare an item and present it at Thanksgiving.  

He'd be even more proud if they ate it without looking like they wanted to either puke or die laughing.  For once, I would like them to think I am "wife material".  As ridiculous as that sounds, it is true.  He doesn't care, but I do and I want them to think he is well taken care of.  Which he is not because I neither cook nor clean nor do the laundry.  But, I do love him a lot.....I do pick up his dry cleaning on occasion.


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## hawaii02 (Nov 25, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *rbella* 

 
_My God!!! You are all cooking geniuses! Thank you very much. I will try one of these fo sho. Whichever one uses the least ingredients and doesn't involve a lot of stirring or anything like that. Seriously, I'm that bad. My husband won't even eat my toast and I'm not joking.



Totally be pussing out. My poor husband was raised in a family of cooks and they always make fun of how much his life must suck being married to me. Isn't that kind? They are kidding, of course, they actually love me, but it still gets old. I know he would be so happy if I could successfully prepare an item and present it at Thanksgiving. 

He'd be even more proud if they ate it without looking like they wanted to either puke or die laughing. For once, I would like them to think I am "wife material". As ridiculous as that sounds, it is true. He doesn't care, but I do and I want them to think he is well taken care of. Which he is not because I neither cook nor clean nor do the laundry. But, I do love him a lot.....I do pick up his dry cleaning on occasion._

 
Ok, your last comment is hysterical


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## rbella (Nov 25, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *elegant-one* 

 
_





 My side hurts from laughing! This is soooo funny rbella...because I can relate. I don't/can't cook either 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 nor do I care to. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




"I always supply the alcohol, why the change, beyotches?"

OMG...
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Just pick something yummy up at a great bakery & put it in your dish, then you can get the credit. Or, make something really bad & then you can go back to bringing the alcohol again.

Or, you can just come to my house...& we'll just drink alcohol 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 

I know, right?????  Why the change in plans all of the sudden?  What the hell?  Trust me, these are farm people and they will sure as hell know if I bring something from a bakery.  I swear to God they raise their own turkeys and their eggs come from their own chickens.  I totally don't fit in.  

And, to make it worse, my MOTHER was raised on a farm and by a mother who could cook AWESOME.  However, my mom can't cook for shit so she never taught me.  Seriously, she thought she was the bomb with grilled cheese.  My husband HATES eating at her house.  It is so sad because all her meals are covered in a layer of black burnt crust that we have to peel off to get the the insides....

I will STILL bring the alcohol.  It will numb my pain....


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## hawaii02 (Nov 25, 2008)

The alcohol is always more fun anyway


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## AdlersMommy22 (Nov 25, 2008)

Id say---- drink alcohol while your making your dish..

then just keep drinking until you get there.

then if they bitch about your cooking, puke on them.

just throwin that out there. do with it what you will


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## Beauty Mark (Nov 25, 2008)

Why can't he do the baking? Just a thought... It makes you no less of a wife/person if you can't bake.

A pumpkin pie with canned pumpkin and store bought crust shouldn't be too hard. I don't have a recipe this moment, but any can of Libby's pumpkin should have one.

Another suggestion would be if you have a friend who bakes, invite her/him over to help.

Good luck!


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## rbella (Nov 25, 2008)

^^^Him baking would be a nightmare.  He asked me where the bowls were located the other day.  He is worse than me.  Seriously, we are sad.  If he could, he would do it in a heartbeat, but we have a better shot because I can at least identify where the oven is located.


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## SkylarV217 (Nov 25, 2008)

I have an easy super good desert you can make ( NO BAKING ) and its ALWAYS gone no mater where we take it 

all you need are

oreos
milk 
choc pudding 
cool whip 


soak enough oreos in milk to cover the bottom of your dish pan what ever ( we use the disposable aluminum ones ( cause people eat that much) the make your choc pudding and put it on top then cover with cool whip and the crumble the rest of the oreos on top... Its so easy and so good ... 

Good luck hun =D


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## Krasevayadancer (Nov 25, 2008)

Awww, I feel for ya. It stinks when things like this come out of nowhere. I can only imagine how much anxiety this products.

I am wracking my brain for something quick, easy, and tasty. Healthy doesn't hurt either 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Does it have to be baked? An ambrosia fruit salad doesn't involve any cooking and it tastes great! Just cut up fruits of your choice, add some light sour cream and mini mallows and you are good to go! Heck, you can even used can fruit (just drain the syrup/juice)

I always get lots of compliments on that!

I will think of some more ideas, while I do best get started on the drinking party (elegant- that is for you too 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




)


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## rbella (Nov 25, 2008)

I plan on starting the imbibing tonight.


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## jdechant (Nov 25, 2008)

Lol...Rbella!! Too funny...ok..don't worry, cause I am not that good of a cook either...I sometimes THINK I am ..but then I burn it..or forget to add an ingredient..lol..Ok..so this is a REALLY easy recipe...

-Buy a box of spice cake mix
-Buy Lots of Cool whip...(maybe two containers)
-Butterscotch pudding (maybe make two boxes)

After the cake is cooked and has cooled, you cut the cake into smaller cubes (about 2 inches by 2 inches)
Layer the cake, pudding and cool whip to make a "trifle" ...I think thats the right word...to make it even prettier, you can use a see through bowl so that you can see the layers....taaa daaa...Thanksgivingish enough, right?? You could also sprinkle on some butterscotch chips if you want on top...or Skor chocolate bar..lol..I dont know if its called skor in the states though..does the chocolate bar heath sound right?? When I was in vegas, they had one like that that was the same thing as canada's "skor" bar...just break it up and sprinkle it on top...(the whip cream should be the last thing on top)

Good Luck!! Let us know how your dessert turns out!!!


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## blindpassion (Nov 25, 2008)

pfttt rbella rocks the house no matter what her cooking skills are.
BAKING IS HARD! don't even get down on yourself
I cant bake anything
I can cook but I cannot bake for the liffee of me.

But you and I can apply a mean fluidline and crease color 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 ill tell you that much.
take that family in law.


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## Krasevayadancer (Nov 25, 2008)

Ohhh, how about i come over to visit with my boyfriend the trained chef? All I do with him as cook and we are both really good at it :-D

He can bake for you while we drink till we are silly! He once made me an amazing buttercream cake.


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## CantAffordMAC (Nov 25, 2008)

I love you...way too much, I think.






 Good luck with this. My sugestion: Wear that head thing u wore in ur recent FOTD,slap on some lashes, and they will be too stunned to even notice ur cooking.


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## MACATTAK (Nov 25, 2008)

This is super easy & delicious!  No bake cheesecake!

1 graham cracker crust
1 tub cool whip (8 oz)
cream cheese (8 oz, softened)
1/2 cup sugar
1 tsp. vanilla

Cream softened cream cheese (using a beater).  Gradually add sugar.  Add vanilla (whip until fluffy).  Fold in cool whip.  Pour into crust & let sit in the fridge for a few hours.

Before serving I always add either fresh strawberries, or if you can't find those the frozen strawberries will work, so will blueberries.  Good luck on whatever you choose to make!


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## stv578 (Nov 25, 2008)

Rbella, I'm so sorry your husband hasn't learned yet.  If you wanted to make something, you would offer, right?!

I can't think of anything right now, but there are definitely some recipes out there that are relatively easy and still taste good.  This is for thursday, right?  I'm on it and you _will _make your husband proud (and look good too!).


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## MsButterfli (Nov 25, 2008)

whatever i'd bring i WOULDNT eat it just to mess with them, and if they asked why i wasnt eating I'd be like "i forgot the antidote" lol sorry im just evil, id go with a big ass pan of Stouffers Lasagne with extra mozzarella on top and call it a day


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## aleksis210 (Nov 25, 2008)

You know what I just thought of...You know those cheesecake wheels from like costco or even your local grocery store that has all the different flavors...i'm all about cooking/homemade goodness, but who in the HELL wouldn't like that? a crazy person. that's who.


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## TISH1124 (Nov 25, 2008)

Get your apple pie candles and burn then in the house...turn your oven on  to heat up the house...While this is going run to the bakery get a apple pie ...come home transfer it into your pie dish...sprinkle a little cinnamon and sugar on the top carelessly for appearance only...Dessert is served!! Yeahhh!!!

Ps. you know I am your sister from another mother....I was in charge of the HAM....Honey Baked loved me this morning when I picked up to nice ones!!!


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## MzzRach (Nov 25, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *TISH1127* 

 
_Get your apple pie candles and burn then in the house...turn your oven on to heat up the house...While this is going run to the bakery get a apple pie ...come home transfer it into your pie dish...sprinkle a little cinnamon and sugar on the top carelessly for appearance only...Dessert is served!! Yeahhh!!!

Ps. you know I am your sister from another mother....I was in charge of the HAM....Honey Baked loved me this morning when I picked up to nice ones!!!_

 
In my opinion, this is the perfect solution.  Or the cheesecake wheelie from Costo that Aleksis suggested.


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## MzzRach (Nov 25, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *MsButterfli* 

 
_whatever i'd bring i WOULDNT eat it just to mess with them, and if they asked why i wasnt eating I'd be like "i forgot the antidote" lol sorry im just evil, id go with a big ass pan of Stouffers Lasagne with extra mozzarella on top and call it a day_


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## Kelly78 (Nov 25, 2008)

Go to coolwhip.com - there's some really super easy recipes there. Good luck!!


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## Simply Elegant (Nov 25, 2008)

Whichever recipe you choose, I'd do a small test run just to make sure it'll turn out. Then they can't complain because you'll know it's good.


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## SMMY (Nov 25, 2008)

I just want to see pictures of said dessert.
and rbella, I feel your pain.
whats an oven?


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## chocolategoddes (Nov 25, 2008)

Let me introduce you to my good friend Sara Lee.


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## RoxyJ (Nov 26, 2008)

Easiest Recipe ever:
1 20 oz can of crushed pineapples
1 box of 1 step angel food cake

Preheat over to 350*
Spay a large cake pan with non-stick spray
Add all of the canned pineapple to the mix, (make sure you use a really big bowl this stuff expands). Stir until well mixed. Pour into cake pan.
Cook for time stated on box.

Optional: Top with coolwhip
Optional: Top with coconut
Optional: Drisle with Maple Syrup (add points for this one)

Super Weight Watcher Friendly (I think 2 points per slice, but i can'r remember)


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## rbella (Nov 26, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *SMMY* 

 
_I just want to see pictures of said dessert.
and rbella, I feel your pain.
whats an oven?_

 

SMMY, how did I know you would understand?  I love you.  I am going to try my hand at this damn thing called a "gooey butter cake".  It is from a cookbook that my husband's mom gave me called the "Cake Doctor", which in an of itself says how much faith she has in me.  It looks like it might be simple enough.  I shall take pictorials and let you see.

BTW, as a sidenote, I get a friggin' cookbook every year from my MIL as a Christmas gift and a Birthday gift.  Take a damn hint, okay?  I suck.  I don't cook, I burn things, I don't measure correctly, I sweat while I bake, I hate everything involving an oven or stove or pot or boiling water.  WTF?  Why cant' you get a freaking clue when I bring wine every year that all I know how to do is pop a damn cork?


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## Esme (Nov 26, 2008)

I say the way his family treats you is not right, even if you do say they love you. Screw em, get drunk before you go, say, "I'll show you pie, M-F's" flash em, then puke on the turkey!!
Oh yeah, I know you won't though.
Look, honey,  I am 50, I cook a hundred times better than either of my husband's mothers (that is one ex and one current husband and one mother each, it didn't come out too clear) and I would NOT cook for people who treated me like that. See, love is one of the ingredients and if you ain't feelin' it, it will show. So burn their cake.
Seriously, can you get your mom or a sister or friend who cooks well to help you?


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## blindpassion (Nov 26, 2008)

lolll ^ she should definitely puke on the turkey.


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## TISH1124 (Nov 26, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *rbella* 

 
_SMMY, how did I know you would understand? I love you. I am going to try my hand at this damn thing called a "gooey butter cake". It is from a cookbook that my husband's mom gave me called the "Cake Doctor", which in an of itself says how much faith she has in me. It looks like it might be simple enough. I shall take pictorials and let you see.

BTW, as a sidenote, I get a friggin' cookbook every year from my MIL as a Christmas gift and a Birthday gift. Take a damn hint, okay? I suck. I don't cook, I burn things, I don't measure correctly, I sweat while I bake, I hate everything involving an oven or stove or pot or boiling water. WTF? Why cant' you get a freaking clue when I bring wine every year that all I know how to do is pop a damn cork?_

 

Let her know your dh married you for your many hidden secret talents ...and cooking was not one of them...Tell her you can't elaborate because it would get far to personal and explicit ....She would probably faint...
Good luck with the dessert...I can't wait to see pictures too... Not of the actual dessert but of you covered in flour 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Oh sorry


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## SMMY (Nov 26, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Esme* 

 
_I say the way his family treats you is not right, even if you do say they love you. Screw em, get drunk before you go, say, "I'll show you pie, M-F's" flash em, then puke on the turkey!!
Oh yeah, I know you won't though.
Look, honey,  I am 50, I cook a hundred times better than either of my husband's mothers (that is one ex and one current husband and one mother each, it didn't come out too clear) and I would NOT cook for people who treated me like that. See, love is one of the ingredients and if you ain't feelin' it, it will show. So burn their cake.
Seriously, can you get your mom or a sister or friend who cooks well to help you?_

 
I'm voting for the pie-flashing and turkey vomiting as well. Seriously though, why make someone stress out over something that isn't their forte? Its just mean spirited and evil. I still think that you should just go store bought and the hell with them. You work hard for a living, so no excuses are needed and they should understand. Thanksgiving should be about fun and good company, not a stress-o-thon. 

That being said, us specktra-ites have your back and think you're fabulous, pie or not.

and pictures please, because we love you.


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## Chikky (Nov 26, 2008)

I would totally buy a package of those pre-cut sugar cookies with the designs in them that all you have to do is put on a sheet and bake.


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## TISH1124 (Nov 26, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *Chikky* 

 
_I would totally buy a package of those pre-cut sugar cookies with the designs in them that all you have to do is put on a sheet and bake._

 
yep add a few M&M's for the original homebaked appeal 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Ok Bella...I did buy my hams...just say'n ....I'm gonna put my honey baked ham in a roaster and replace the HBH foil with reynolds wrap foil paper ...


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## MzzRach (Nov 27, 2008)

rbella - please don't wind yourself into a frenzy over this. It's not worth it. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




We all have our strengths and weaknesses, *so effing what* if you are not a gourmet chef. You are an amazing human being. Let's see, which matters more? 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I know your DH loves you (he better!) and his family too, it just hurts me to see you stressing.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving tomorrow.


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## MiCHiE (Nov 27, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *TISH1127* 

 
_Let her know your dh married you for your many hidden secret talents ...and cooking was not one of them...Tell her you can't elaborate because it would get far to personal and explicit ....She would probably faint..._

 
I'm sure they've already figured that out LOL. Seriously, I had to stop dating my last on-again-off-again BF when I thought his family figured it out.


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## jdechant (Nov 27, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *TISH1127* 

 
_yep add a few M&M's for the original homebaked appeal 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Ok Bella...I did buy my hams...just say'n ....I'm gonna put my honey baked ham in a roaster and replace the HBH foil with reynolds wrap foil paper ...
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 

Haha..m&m's for the homebaked appeal? haha..thats brilliant!


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## iheartcolor (Nov 27, 2008)

Jell-o No Bake Cheesecake!

So easy! And tasty!

-Lauren


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## rbella (Nov 27, 2008)

OMG!  I just made the dessert and it is friggin' hilarious.  I cannot wait to take a picture and show ya'll.  You will die laughing.  My DH went to get a buttload of wine so that I can be good and inebriated when I arrive with this "masterpiece".  It is completely burnt.  I'm actually glad.  If I succeeded, then I wouldn't be me!  It was supposed to be some kind of "gooey butter squares" from my "Cake Doctor" book someone gave me awhile back.  I don't believe it is supposed to be dark brown....

Thanks for all the kind words, you ladies are the best.

SMMY & MzzRach-that made me feel really good.  Thank you!


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## rbella (Nov 27, 2008)

And here it is in all its glory:







Gorgeous isn't it?  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	













It is supposed to "buttery yellow" on top.  Oh My God.  This will be interesting.....


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## TISH1124 (Nov 27, 2008)

It doesn't look bad to me....drizzel some conf/powdered sugar on top for decoration


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## MrsMay (Nov 27, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *rbella* 

 
_OMG! I just made the dessert and it is friggin' hilarious. I cannot wait to take a picture and show ya'll. You will die laughing. My DH went to get a buttload of wine so that I can be good and inebriated when I arrive with this "masterpiece". It is completely burnt. I'm actually glad. If I succeeded, then I wouldn't be me! It was supposed to be some kind of "gooey butter squares" from my "Cake Doctor" book someone gave me awhile back. I don't believe it is supposed to be dark brown....

Thanks for all the kind words, you ladies are the best.

SMMY & MzzRach-that made me feel really good. Thank you!_

 
rbella... please know that we all love you regardless of the cake!
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




that being said... I have been stalking this thread waiting to see how you went with the baking, and would like to offer you a big glass of wine as a consolation prize


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## MrsMay (Nov 27, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *rbella* 

 
_ 
Gorgeous isn't it? 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	













It is supposed to "buttery yellow" on top. Oh My God. This will be interesting....._

 
I'm sure it will taste fine!  I agree with Tish.... perhaps some icing sugar?  Or can you get some pre-packaged frosting or something?  Overall it looks pretty good though - it's not black and flat, so you've done well!


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## TISH1124 (Nov 27, 2008)

The powered sugar will make it like the Funnel cakes at the fair...I love those things...sprinkle sprinkle sprinkle


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## TamiChoi (Nov 27, 2008)

aw, rbella, i hope everything goes perfect for you.
don't worry so much. i can't cook for shit lol.
i say, buy something that's easy to make by step-by-step instructions, or buy something and add your touch to it to make like you made it 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




edit, sorry i'm late just saw the pic. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 ^^ agree with Tish! frosting doesn't sound bad either.


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## TISH1124 (Nov 27, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *TamiChoi* 

 
_aw, rbella, i hope everything goes perfect for you.
don't worry so much. i can't cook for shit lol.
i say, buy something that's easy to make by step-by-step instructions, or buy something and add your touch to it to make like you made it 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	


_

 
Girl you see she already made a beautiful cake....


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## rbella (Nov 27, 2008)

Awww, thanks Mrs. May and TISH!!  I have some powdered sugar, so I will do just that.  Perhaps they won't notice how much it sucks until they actually eat it.

MrsMay-I'll take that glass of wine now!!!!!!!!!!


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## blindpassion (Nov 27, 2008)

haha you are amazing.


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## MrsMay (Nov 27, 2008)

^^ Pours rbella a massive glass of wine....


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## rbella (Nov 27, 2008)

As a reference, this is what it was _supposed_ to look like (in square form though).


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## TISH1124 (Nov 27, 2008)

Hey yours looks like that just with a Tan...Hell we are in TEXAS...everything is browner down here damn it !  I was white b4 I moved here from Ohio


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## Zantedge (Nov 27, 2008)

Rbella, I would totally eat that cake! Save a piece for me? lol


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## rbella (Nov 27, 2008)

Ya'll are too kind.  You know it is gonna taste like funk.  Oh well, I don't give a damn.  At this point it is too late.  I can't cook-who cares???????????  My DH doesn't and that's all that matters!

***still secretly dying inside that I have to present this tomorrow...***


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## MrsMay (Nov 27, 2008)

rbella, that doesnt look too far off the picture!  You did a good job!  I would _so _totally eat that!


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## jdechant (Nov 27, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *rbella* 

 
_As a reference, this is what it was supposed to look like (in square form though).




_

 

Girl, dont worry!! Your cake looks just fine!..plus, that bitch cake above only looks like that AFTER photoshop..lol...


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## rbella (Nov 27, 2008)

Ahahahahahhaha!!! "Bitch Cake", I love it!!!!!!!!!!


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## jdechant (Nov 27, 2008)

Don't they know cakes in real life don't look like that!!?? Lol...and everyone that reads those magazines and cookbooks longing for their cakes to look like the pictures in the books, but its not REAL LIFE..Damn you photoshop, damn you! hahaha...ok Jenna, too much wine! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




But really, It always gets me down when I cook a recipe, cause it never ends up looking like the picture..haha..EVER...


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## Chikky (Nov 27, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *TISH1127* 

 
_Hey yours looks like that just with a Tan...Hell we are in TEXAS...everything is browner down here damn it !  I was white b4 I moved here from Ohio_

 
You're on fire tonight, hehe. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




And, rbella, it doesn't look bad; I agree with the powdered sugar idea! 

Hey, I can't bake either. I made cupcakes a few weeks ago? The total time to prepare and bake was like, 40 minutes total. I took over three hours. They tasted good, but it took forever, heh. My brother is so totally the baker out of us two.


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## NutMeg (Nov 27, 2008)

I would definitely eat that.


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## aleksis210 (Nov 27, 2008)

Rbella, I think it would look tons better if you cut it into squares and stack em on top of a dish..I think it'll look like blondies if you do that! (vanilla brownies) because I gotta be honest it looks like mac and cheese...lol But more power to you if you don't give a shit! haha! Now that i think about it...you should play evil and tell em it's mac and cheese or even potatoes au gratin and sit back and enjoy the facial expressions... lmao


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## SuSana (Nov 27, 2008)

I made the pumpkin cookies concertina gave the recipe for...omg so good and easy, she wasn't lying!  Your cake looks fine, but I agree with Aleksis, cut it up and stack them 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Isn't it the thought that counts anyways??  You tried your best and too damn bad what everyone thinks.


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## rbella (Nov 27, 2008)

Thanks, ladies. It does not taste good  AT ALL.  Tastes like burnt butter & curtled milk.  But, DH said he is going to march right in there and eat a big ass slice BEFORE the turkey, just to show them he loves it & is thankful I tried.  He's a good egg.


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## Willa (Nov 27, 2008)

I'd taste it if I could 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I laughed so hard about the ''bitch cake'' thing 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I hope they don't make too much fun of you 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	






Just arrive and say : you wanted a desert? Here it is, now can we get drunk?

To make you feel good : I'm a good chef, but deserts arent my cup of tea, I can't cook them without burning


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## MzzRach (Nov 27, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *TISH1127* 

 
_Hey yours looks like that just with a Tan...Hell we are in TEXAS...everything is browner down here damn it ! I was white b4 I moved here from Ohio_

 











Happy Thanksgiving, rbella, and to the other Americans in this thread.


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## TISH1124 (Nov 27, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *rbella* 

 
_Thanks, ladies. It does not taste good AT ALL. Tastes like burnt butter & curtled milk. But, DH said he is going to march right in there and eat a big ass slice BEFORE the turkey, just to show them he loves it & is thankful I tried. He's a good egg._

 

He is for sure a Keeper!! Thats what a devoted spouse would do!! Great guy!!!!


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## rbella (Nov 27, 2008)

Thanks, girls! Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!!!!


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## jdechant (Nov 28, 2008)

sooo....how did your day go rbella?? Was it everything you expected and more??!!


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## rbella (Nov 28, 2008)

^^^I love you, you are so sweet to ask.  It actually went very well and I have to admit that I totally underestimated the majority of his family.  My only severe irritations came from the mom and stepdad, but other than that his sister and brother in law were awesome.  They ate it with smiles on their faces although I could see the cry out for help in their eyes. 

The mom and stepdad didn't even touch it.  As a matter of fact, the mom shoved her desserts in my face instead and told me how easy they were for her to make them and as delicious as she knows they are "wouldn't I love for her to teach me how to bake?"  My answer to that is a big HELL NO.  But, instead of telling her to fuck off, I politely answered with "Yes, those are delicious....Oh crud, I think I lost my keys."  Then I left the room.

I deal with them via avoidance.  It's the best way, really.  My hubby ate them with pride and raved about how amazing of a wife I am.  He is so sweet, I am really lucky.  He also gave me some diamond earrings as a gift before we left because he knew I was stressed, so I gotta give him some severe props for that.

I hope you had a great turkey day!  How was your day?


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## TISH1124 (Nov 28, 2008)

^^^ A little stressful baking = Diamond earrings...I am so stressing and baking for Christmas...Maybe my husband will see it the same way...So Doubtful but the constant dropping of LARGE hints may help!!! 

I am so glad you had a great time and it was not as painful as anticipated!! Your husband is such a stand up guy and sounds like one of the most wonderful men in the world ...after my dh of course


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## jdechant (Nov 28, 2008)

Yah your husband sounds awesome!! So glad that he understood that you were stressing out about the whole thing and decided to do something about it!! (Stress+Diamonds = STRESS FREE) lol..its a really complicated calculation and nobody understands WHY it works..but it just does..lol...my day was ok..didn't have turkey but I had fun listening to all your guys' stories on specktra!!! Getting a little stressed out about the christmas season (like every year) but it will all pay off in the end when I get to see my little girls face the morning of christmas.. lol...

P.S. Avoidance is good....By doing so, you are helping them "avoid" your fist from hitting their face....lolol....JK...but it just drives me nuts when people do that stuff just because they know it will make you upset..idunno....maybe they don't even realize that they are doing anything wrong..I have some relatives that are like that..


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## sweetie0716 (Nov 28, 2008)

I think yours looks better than the picture of what it's supposed to look like!


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## florabundance (Nov 28, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *rbella* 

 
_instead of telling her to fuck off, I politely answered with "Yes, those are delicious"_

 











 LMFAOOOOO.
You're hysterical....

 Quote:

   Originally Posted by *rbella* 

 
_My hubby ate them with pride and raved about how amazing of a wife I am. He is so sweet, I am really lucky. He also gave me some diamond earrings as a gift before we left because he knew I was stressed, so I gotta give him some severe props for that._

 
And, umm, I need to get me one of those ^^^^^, where did you find him? Or is yours free to take or what..what's the deal????


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## blindpassion (Nov 28, 2008)

You have great control rbella. If that incident occured to me after a few glasses of wine I would be spewing the swear words like a drunk sailor.


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## rbella (Nov 28, 2008)

Quote:

   Originally Posted by *florabundance* 

 
_











 LMFAOOOOO.
You're hysterical....



And, umm, I need to get me one of those ^^^^^, where did you find him? Or is yours free to take or what..what's the deal????_

 
You can borrow him, but you CANNOT have him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## jdechant (Nov 28, 2008)

Lol..Rbella, you could start a business...Rent-A-Hubby ...lol..for those stressful times when a girl just needs some extra compliments..haha..


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## rbella (Nov 28, 2008)

OMG!!!  That is great idea!!  You know my man is thrifty and always lookin' for ways to make money.  I will run it by him today.....ahahahahhahhaaha, I wouldn't be able to handle it.  I'd cry if he complimented anyone else.


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## Krasevayadancer (Nov 29, 2008)

You are a trooper my dear. Glad it wasn't as painless as anticipated.

Knowing me, I would have probably had a tantrum if I was put through that much stress.

P.S offer still stands, we can come over anytime and bake for ya


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## aleksis210 (Dec 1, 2008)

ewww Rbella did she really say 'Wouldn't you love for me to teach you how to bake?' NOOOO THAAANKS...BYYEE ....lol


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## irukandjii (Dec 1, 2008)

hi ladies
(waves and giggles nervously, a rookie surrounded by pros..feelin the pressure 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





)

i know i'm like so ten years later but i read this before thanxgiving and couldnt for the life of me come up with a fool proof recipe, i guess i was sidetracked with all the other recipes 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




but just in case rbella, and for what its worth, i cant bake but i use my sisters recipe for her take on mud cake. you pick out a chocolate cake mix (preferably betty crocker...dunno 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 its just cuz ) then you bake according to instructions. whip up chocolate pudding (to box's directions of course) and pour over cooled cake. take a tub of whipped cream and smooth over choc pudding then shave some choc bits over it and voila! you're done 

sorry i couldnt have had that up earlier, but maybe next time


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## rbella (Dec 1, 2008)

^^^You're so sweet!  Don't worry, I will save it for next time.  Trust me, there will be a next time!!!  Don't feel nervous, we were all new once!!!


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## abbey_08 (Dec 1, 2008)

im still laughing at cake photoshop!! haha


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## Le-Saboteur (Dec 2, 2008)

Okay, no help from me, but I can't believe you guys can buy pumpkin in a can? WTF?


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