# Do I do it because it's good for me?



## Kisbee (Oct 11, 2006)

..or because I'm getting married in July? (and does it matter?)

Let's see, the saga began about 3 years ago when I realised that I was eating like a boy, but being 6 inches smaller than the ones I was eating with, it wasn't doing me any good.

I'm a recreational dancer (ballet), currently taking classes with girls half my age (13 year olds or so) who are *tiny*, so I'm very sensitive to small changes in weight.

At my heaviest I was 9 1/2 stone (about 135 pounds), which wasn't terrible, but it was squidgier than I wanted. I'm currently stuck at just over 9 stone (about 125) which is ok but I could do with being made of more muscle and less squidge.

I've had to start keeping track of everything I eat online, otherwise I just keep eating (don't really have a full cut-off), I do feel a little obsessive doing it, but I guess if it works, don't knock it.

I've also started the Couch to 5k thing on www.coolrunning.com, which has been pretty good. I struggle to run 3 times a week tho, so I'm just going as fast as I can. I'm currently on the anti-penultimate (I love that word) week, so getting up to running 25 minutes without stopping.

Whatelse.. I should be doing weights, but I'm not, I'm not stretching as much as I should, but at least I eat my vegetables...


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## Kisbee (Oct 12, 2006)

I'm confused about my eating habits. According to the online thing I keep track of food in, I'm eating about 200 cal less than my goal (1800 or so) on a fairly regular basis. I think I'm being relatively accurate with my estimation of portion sizes, and remembering to put in snacks and things I've used in cooking, so I can't really work it out. I don't feel hungry either, but I've been lusting for chocolate and cake-y things a lot recently..but that's probably hormonal/emotional.

Don't think I'll manage a run now again this week, but we're going away for the weekend and I think there's some hard-core gardening planned.


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## Kisbee (Oct 13, 2006)

Leave it to beer...think I managed to make up all the lost calories with curry and naan bread (homemade tho, both of them) and brownies and beer. But it was worth it, the bit that wasn't worth it was the frantic 10 minute binge that I had before I started cooking. It wasn't dreadful, a few digestive biscuits before I sensibly had some bread and cheese to fill me up, but it was odd.

Have been taking the bus to work too much this week, I blame Specktra-ites for persuading me that make up is more fun than leaving the house and my cat for coming in before my alarm goes off and making me pet him while he purrs at ear-shattering levels.


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## Kisbee (Oct 20, 2006)

Ergh... I feel dreadful. Just entered my measurements into my food journal and it has my body fat going up.. it's only 1.6%, but that'l back where I started.

I'm constantly craving cake..white cake, victoria sponge-type thing, the more artificial the better. There wasn't any at the shops last night, so I ended up with chocolate...not sure it was a good idea, but I just wanted stodge and fat (and man did I succeed)..

Must eat vegetables today, but I'm really off my food at the moment (which never happens, not even when I'm ill).

So generally hating the way I feel, but going for a run tonight.


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## Kisbee (Oct 27, 2006)

Horrible weather, didn't go for a run last night like I had intended, and I'm hoping I'll manage tonight.

Feeling a bit sorry for myself, but trying not to let it stop me from doing stuff I should.

Feel like I need a good stretch, seem to have managed to get back to pre-injury flexibility, hopefully I'll have time at rehearsal tomorrow to do some more work on it, I need to start working on my back again.


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## lovemetodeath (Oct 27, 2006)

keep up with it, you will get there in the end. You sound like me, as soon as i try to cut back on what i eat i just crave, cakes, chocolate and all the wrong stuff where as if i don't think about it I would probably just grab an apple when I'm hungry.

Do you drink loads of water? I am trying to drink at least 2 lites a day and I'm finding if i am peckish I grab a glass of water and it takes the edge off the hunger.

You might find though that you start to lose some weight naturally through the stress of the wedding. I know when i had mine my dress was taken in about 3 rimes as i justkept losing weight.

good luck


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## Kisbee (Oct 30, 2006)

Water is soo good, I started drinking more of it when I went to a sports massage man about a problem with my leg. I had to cut back because I was drinking 3+ litres a day and was getting dizzy..

I did better this weekend, I managed to go for two runs (and then ate lots of crisps and sweeties at the pub quiz..they shouldn't give them out for free!) and tried to be fairly good about booze...

I think I can easily do without sugary things, but if I start eating them, I start to crave things more...I might see if I can take a week off desserts/cake and see if that helps. Thanks for the suggestions!


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## Kisbee (Oct 31, 2006)

So much for no cake.. had some caramel cake as a reward for finishing a job application. But I've got nice pumpkin seeds for a snack today...


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## Kisbee (Nov 6, 2006)

Managed one run this week, I'm blaming PMT...still I haven't been feeling too bad about it (new pills with not too many fat days, we like...).

This week is show week, which means a lot of sandwiches for tea (boo) and probably not too much running. I don't have anything Monday or Wednesday, so I might make myself go for a run as soon as I get home, so then I can crash with the Boy and not feel guilty.

Soo..running tonight, PMT or no PMT..(I'm up to 28 minutes, it's the penultimate week of Couch to 5k...it's quite exciting really)


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## Kisbee (Nov 7, 2006)

Yay! I ran, even tho I was trying to talk myself out of it (why? I have no idea..)..


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## Kisbee (Nov 8, 2006)

Going for a run tonight if my headache clears (maybe even if it doesn't)..just a wee note to remind myself to go..


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## Kisbee (Nov 9, 2006)

I lose..no run for me last night. For some reason I couldn't face leaving the house..and then I had a bit of a binge.....on breadsticks. I finished the packet (luckily it was mostly empty)...but I thought it was a bit random..


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## Kisbee (Nov 20, 2006)

Went for a run on Saturday, and spent the rest of the weekend doing DIY...didn't eat too much too much, except last night with a well-deserved pizza-fest.

I've managed to finish the Couch to 5k programme (I skipped a little and just decided to run for the full 30 minutes), which is good.. think I might treat myself to an eyeshadow or something as a treat!


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## Kisbee (Jan 3, 2007)

Still running (or rather I went yesterday)..

Feeling the Christmas squidge a bit (and the impending first toile for wedding dress is approaching), and still trying to sort out how to deal with my standing-up-all-day job. I seem to be on a cheese scone kick, which needs to change. I think I've got a bran muffin recipe somewhere which I'll dig out and make some mini muffins to take in.

In the meanwhile, does anyone want to help me with the Christmas shortbread/chocolates/brownie backlog?


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